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nox-the-former-demon · 1 year ago

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>>In this post, I, the former demon known now as Nox will detail my current situation. My position in the headspace of my headmate, the relationships I’ve managed to forge, and the peculiarities that surround me.

First, there was absolution. An emptiness that drained any sense of self from me. I had assumed that that was what second death felt like, what having your existence wiped out would be. When you see nothing, hear nothing, experience nothing, you first go mad, and then you go quiet, and you cease. All thought goes quiet and you feel the absolute nothingness that. An only be described as a disconnection from existence itself. This was my state of being for a long time as I recovered. It makes sense, all that had survived of me was my eye, not that I knew that at the time.

After the absolution, when I was fully recovered, absolute quiet became murmurs, whispers in the distance that cut the quiet and woke me from my seemingly eternal rest. As I open my eyes, I found myself in darkness, twisted and abstract. I was wandering, lost, following the sounds I heard in an attempt to find something. Anything. I didn’t know who o was, where I was, why I was. All I knew was that I was.

It was when I finally grew close enough to the source of the sounds that I could make them out clearly that I began to be able to act in any capacity. And I’ll admit, I was a bit of a dick. I could hear self lamentation, self hatred, and I decided to make it worse. To insult and chastise and just generally be a jerk. It was the only thing that felt appropriate in the moment. And while she couldn’t make me out clearly at first, Asa did hear. And she responded in some part. This made the rest of my journey out of the dark easier. Eventually I spotted a light. Eventually I found what would become our single room headspace.

That simple space, maybe 12 feet on any side, a perfect square, a pair of screens, a chair, and Asa. I didn’t recognize her at first. And she didn’t notice me at first either. I sat down, and I watched. Her drama was like a movie to me. I was the passive observer, like the passenger in the car of a road trip: I could speak to the driver, who may or may not acknowledge me, but I still didn’t have power yet. Not yet.

It was a while before that came. Before Asa started to realize that I wasn’t just her self doubts. The thing that tipped us was her first big breakdown. Emotions ran heavy, and she couldn’t handle it, so she fell out of the chair. It would have been a total shut down, but I was there. And I played with the controller some. I experimented. I did chores, spoke as if I was her. Establishing that I could have just as much control as Asa could. And eventually, she caught onto me.

We still didn’t know much about what I was yet. But my presence grew more and more undeniable until I was finally spoke directly to eachother by way of the app known as discord, a private server, speaking back and forth, seemingly to one’s self, but not. Our personalities clashed. We thought I was a splinter of hers at first, pieces that had broken off and started to exist on their own. That would prove wrong later when Asa would go to confide in someone else. When true coincidence, or maybe true fate, struck.

The person Asa had confided in was possessed by Silus, and I recognized him. And all my memories started to rush back. I did my best to try and tak Silus down, talk my son down from his rage, but it didn’t help. I’ll talk more about this later but what mattered was I was remembering. And once I remembered who I was, Asa did too.

It is at this point now where I need to explain those who surround me. Asa, my headmate, my murderer, my metamour… Asa had been born in such a condition that lead to her eventually going on to meet and marry Cariel’s reincarnation. Something Cariel had no doubt planned for as well. The pair of them lived their mortal lives together, four children in tow, followed by a pair of guardians. Flak, Asa’s brother from before being born again, watched Cariel, and Casella, another of Cariel’s servants, guarded and monitored Asa, intangible spirits who had at some point in the past been forced to come in contact with them, building interpersonal relationships by way of possession and communication. I was surrounded by my former enemies.

Before you ask, no, my presence wasn’t appreciated at first. They tried to get rid of me but they couldn’t. I was tangled too deep in Asa’s soul. At first, the plan was for me to keep quiet. I had my confidants I’d speak to but nobody else. But… well, now that I was alive again, mortal again, I started to grow lonely.

And eventually, I had to make my presence known. First to Cariel, or rather, to Nel. Nel was the person who needed to know first because to be frank, never talking aloud was maddening. Nel wasn’t thrilled by it, but accepted it, albeit not without some threats. Honestly it was a massive shift from the Cariel I knew. As Nel, they were more… how to describe it… less holier than thou, more wrath of nature. It was refreshing in its own way. And it was around this point in time I decided I needed a new name. My old name didn’t suit me in my current state. It took a couple days, but the name Nox stuck.

Even then, only speaking to two confidants and Nel wasn’t enough. I slowly showed my existence in online spaces, and now, I’m a known presence among most of Asa’s social circles. And eventually… I made friends. And I even started to feel deeper emotions…

I’ll spare you the details. Nel and I eventually found common ground, started to get along. And now, we’re romantically intertwined. Nel isn’t the only person I can firmly say I love, there is another, but she doesn’t feel the same way, so I’ve accepted our relationship staying platonic. Furthermore, I’ve other friends, two of whom even see me as something of a mentor figure. For the first time in a millennium, I feel like I’ve actually felt alive…

That day, that day Asa begged Casella to kill my son… as horrible as that was to witness, it was the day that set in motion my return to humanity. It was the day that set in motion the Former to my demon status. It was the day my life started to begin anew. Asa and I. In a 12 by 12 room. A chair, a control station, a couch, a patio we can’t use, a lamp, a yellow dress for her and a charcoal suit for me… it’s not much. But it’s from this space that I’ve started to live again.

Asa is annoying as fuck though. The fact that Casella and she are a thing is also a pain since they’re both impulsive and chatterboxes, plus Nel and Asa’s children are intolerable some days, and not having my own face, ugh, I absolutely hate all of that. But… it’s a humble position in life that has helped me move on from the past I’d been broiling in for all those years.<<

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gingerbreadmonsters · 2 years ago

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kingdom come

or: flustered by four of a kind, call that a royal flush…

gn!reader (both lovely and freelancer), contains sub lovely and dom freelancer, the spicy sexy get-together of my dreams. at last, the awesome foursome come out to play! oh, discord, i owe you so much… who would have thought that @sri-rachaa ‘s innocent little discussion about sam waiting in the DAMN car park would have turned into this? a round of applause for the inhabitants of the incubi channel, without whom - despite several attempts on my life - this would never have been possible. a BIG thank you to @haradasaya , who very generously proofread this for me, and @daveyismyloml , who valiantly attempted to, despite… challenging circumstances. oh, and a little birdie told me that @friendlyfaded and @autisticempathydaemon might want to know about this... 💕💕💕 features east asian!vincent, as he appears in 五二零, but it’s only a few nicknames so you can ignore that if you really want, i guess. lovely having a very, very good evening in just over 5000 words.

neither lovely or freelancer’s bodies are described in detail, and neither is stated to possess any particular… hardware. no degrading or gendered pet names are used, although both lovely and freelancer are referred to as ‘beautiful’, ‘pretty’, ‘sweetie’ etc.

this fic contains explicit nsfw content, and is very, very 18+. reader discretion is heavily advised. minors dni. thank you.

You don’t know what you did in a past life to deserve this, but it must have been something really, really good.

“Tease. Do you always sit with Vincent like that, or is that just for our benefit, hmm?”

“Oh, not always. Show them, lovely - you like it this way too, don’t you?”

Vincent’s hands on your waist are warm and strong as he deftly turns you to straddle him, hiking your leg over his hips as he grinds up into you. Head tipping back, your chest presses against his and your fingers twist in the collar of his shirt, lost in that delicious friction. Briefly, you mourn the loss of what was a very nice view, but you don’t have to wait long - the incubus behind you wastes no time in crawling past you on the bed, draping himself over Vincent’s back and reaching around to fiddle with his belt. The room is hot, air slow and syrupy in the darkness of the blackout curtains, and you’re very, very grateful that this room is soundproofed.

Wait, but where’s-

“Forget about me?” Freelancer’s fingers turn your chin as they smile into your shoulder, kissing slowly across your back and around to your other side. “Don’t tell me you’ve let them distract you already.”

“And what’s wrong with that, deviant?” The clink of metal, the smooth slide of leather against fabric as Gavin pulls Vincent’s belt free with a flourish, one careless hand dropping it over the side of the bed. “We make an excellent team, in case you’ve forgotten.”

Vincent nods, pulling your shirt off as he smiles not-so-innocently up at you. “We really do. You gave us a glowing review last time, didn’t you? Go on, honey. Tell Freelancer what you said.”

“Mmm…” It’s hard to think, with all the hands roaming your body, with Vincent hard and breathing heavily underneath you, but you do your best. “Very - mmm, very full…”

“You were, weren’t you?” Freelancer grabs your waist and twists you round again, pulling you down on top of them while Gavin keeps Vincent occupied - faintly, you register the sound of clothes falling off the bed and hitting the floor behind you. Their thigh presses just right between your legs as you fall, and you have no choice but to stifle your moan into their shoulder. “So beautiful. You were so good, little lovely. You want to be good for me now?”

You nod hurriedly, hiding your face in Freelancer’s shirt to hide what you’re sure is a humiliatingly needy expression. It’s kind of embarrassing, being stuck on top of their body like this, but their voice is so nice that it doesn’t really matter. Your shirt might be gone but the denim of your jeans is infuriatingly thick as you try to roll your hips, whining quietly at the loss of friction.

Quickly, your moans turn into a sharp gasp as Freelancer slips one hand between your bodies, wrenching the button of your jeans open and dipping inside to stroke over the thin fabric of your underwear. Their other arm holds you close, forearm locked around your waist as you writhe at the delicious pressure of their fingers, and the appreciative sigh somewhere at the other end of the bed tells you that the view must be pretty good from where the others are standing. Sitting? You can’t tell. Feels good. Freelancer laughs quietly, though not unkindly, at your eagerness - with your eyes shut tight against their collarbone, you feel it more than hear it.

Fortunately, the others take pity on you - a noticeably-undressed Gavin scoops you out of Freelancer’s arms to hold you, back against his chest, while they scramble out of the way to take their clothes off. Vincent takes it upon himself to rid you of your remaining clothes as well, pressing kisses down the line of your legs as your jeans and underwear join the growing pile of fabric by the side of the bed.

“Now, what do we have here?” Gavin purrs against your ear, palms sliding slowly over your chest, dipping down to the crease where your hip meets your thigh before trailing back up, bright pink nails catching just slightly over sensitive skin. “If I remember correctly…”

You gasp as his lips find the side of your neck, the gentlest brush of teeth and tongue electric over your pulse as his fingers find their mark. Laughing softly, he nudges your legs just a little wider apart - they’re not spread out across his just yet, but the memory of what happens when they are makes you shiver in anticipation.

“Make a bet with me?” Vincent clearly remembers as well, lying down and propping himself up in front of you with a cheeky grin. “Twenty bucks says I can make you finish fastest, little one. I have a lot of practice, after all.” He winks at Gavin, smirking over your shoulder, and you know immediately that you’re going to be here a while.

“Oh, is that what you think? You’ll have some stiff competi- ah! Okay, oka- I’m stopping!” Wow, you really need to start paying attention to what Freelancer’s doing. The angle makes it a bit difficult to see, but if you crane your neck you can see exactly how they’ve shut Gavin up. Their hands in his hair, from where they’re kneeling up behind him, don’t seem to have entirely had the intended effect, if the way he’s looking up at them (and the hardness pressed against your lower back) is any indication, but none of you mind at all.

“You’re on. How does that sound, pretty thing?” Their voice is dark, all wicked promise and teasing bite, and it’s the best thing you’ve heard in ages. “One for each of us. I think you can manage that, can’t you?”

You must nod, or maybe Freelancer’s a better telepath than they let on - wordlessly, they take Gavin’s place as he swoops down to leave one last kiss on the top of your shoulder, sliding you down the front of their body until your head is cradled against their stomach. From here, one hand gently cups your jaw to keep you looking up at them, while the other traces slow loops across your chest. The sensation makes you shiver slightly, warm fingers skating across sensitive skin, but it’s not unpleasant. In fact, it’s almost enough to distract you from-

“Wait, wait. Not so fast.”

“What?” You can’t see him, but you can feel Vincent lying between your legs, the comforting weight of him pressing down the mattress beneath you both as he shifts impatiently. You don’t need to see him - you know exactly the disappointed pout he’s giving Freelancer from where his head is resting on your thigh. “What is it?”

They don’t reply to him, looking mischievously down at you instead. God, their eyes are so pretty. “You know, I think Vincent’s right. He does get a lot more practice with you, doesn’t he?”

“...Yeah?” You’re not really sure where they’re going with this, but Gavin’s low laughter from where he’s lying by Vincent’s side makes you want to play along. “Yeah, he does.”

It’s the right answer, and Freelancer’s answering grin makes your mind feel all nice and fizzy. “Exactly. I think our Vincent deserves a bit of a handicap, just to make it fair. Don’t you agree?”

“Scared you’ll lose, deviant? Fair enough. What exactly did you have in mind?” They let go of your face for a moment, and you look down your body to see Vincent, eyebrow cocked and looking thoroughly amused.

Freelancer looks pointedly at Gavin, and your skin feels cold as he lifts Vincent’s hand off your thigh and licks his fingers into his mouth. “I said. A handicap.”

You’re… To be perfectly honest, you’re not sure if they lose or gain points for the pun, but you’re too distracted by the sight of Gavin with Vincent’s hand halfway down his throat, spit-slick lips around elegant fingers, hot pink nails clasped around Vincent’s wrist. The sounds he’s making are obscene, and you can’t help but squirm slightly in Freelancer’s lap as you wait for them to be done.

The two of them don’t take long, Gavin’s eyes going a little hazy as Vincent slowly drags his fingers out of his mouth, leaning over to kiss him deeply before turning his attention back to you. It takes a few seconds of slightly awkward repositioning, but before long they’ve sorted themselves out - Gavin’s stretched out against your side, lazy and relaxed, while Vincent’s propped up in front of you, one arm supporting your hips while his other - his, his, uh - haahh, his other - mmm…

His other hand dips down, further, right where he knows you want him - quick, even strokes and confident caresses, slim fingers pressing inside until your back bows and your hips twist in a half-formed plea for more, more, more. Freelancer’s hand finds its way under your chin once again, tilting your gaze upwards and making you blink heavily a few times before you can focus on their face.

“Look at you, darling. Tip your hips up a little - there you are.” Their voice is so nice. Vincent curls his fingers slightly inside you, the angle ever so slightly different, and oh - wait, wait, just - right there! “That’s better, isn’t it? You can tell me, sweet thing, it’s alright. It feels good, doesn’t it? Oh, those fingers are good for more than just the piano, aren’t they…”

Words are too much right now - you whine and nod desperately as their hand returns to your breathless chest, nails dragging lightly over aching nipples. The position is a little clumsy, but Gavin nestles himself against your other side to keep trailing kisses over your neck, and the shiver that races down your spine as he blows cool air teasingly over the skin is just the right side of too much. Between Freelancer’s soft words above you, Gavin’s lazy kisses, and Vincent working you open, it takes an embarrassingly short time to bring you almost to the edge.

“That’s it, lovely…” Maybe he can hear it in your voice, or maybe it’s the way your hands are frantically clawing at the sheets, but Vincent always knows how to take care of you. “So good, aren’t you? So good, always so precious… Let go for me, sweetness, let go, just like that…” You still can’t see him, but the smirk in his words is undeniable - inside you, his fingers twist, deeper and deeper, catching against that soft spot that makes you see stars, and, and-

The world spins white, and for a long moment you’re floating in Freelancer’s arms, letting the wave wash over you, bathing in the calm rhythm of Vincent’s voice. Everything feels warm and happy in your helium mind, and Freelancer lets you relax against their chest while Gavin rubs soothing circles over your hip. They all take such good care of you. It’s nice. You want to say thank you, but your mouth won’t yet form the words, so you settle for a low, contented hum.

Weakly, you smile down at Vincent, one hand lazily carding through his hair as he lays his head against your thigh. He gives you a cute little wave, hands still faintly shiny in the dim light, and - wait, how did you not notice that? - you can see the dark, sticky ring of Gavin’s lipgloss wrapped around his fingers, barely staining the top of his palm. Noticing your gaze, he pops his fingers in his mouth and licks them clean, eyes closed and sighing happily at the taste. Fuck, that’s hot.

“Feeling good, lovely?” You nod, reluctantly letting him untangle himself from your legs, although he makes up for it by leaning up and kissing you softly. “Sure you’re alright to have some more? We can call it a night here if you like.”

“Mmm…” As nice as it would be to just fall asleep like this, you’ve been promised more than just one orgasm tonight, and it would really be a shame to pass up the chance to play with Gavin and Freelancer for a little longer. “No, I wanna keep going.”

“Are you sure, honey? We don’t mind either way,” Gavin’s expression is kind but serious, and when you look up at Freelancer, they’re much the same. “It’s up to you, same as always.”

“I’m sure,” you tell them both, pushing yourself up to sit just in front of Freelancer, reaching over to give Gavin a reassuring hug. His arms feel good around you, safe and steady, and you can’t help but smile when he leans the side of his head against yours. “I’ll tell you if I want to stop, promise.”

He meets your eyes, a familiar smirk spreading across his face before he tilts his head and motions to Freelancer, still sitting behind you with their hands draped over your waist. They laugh, nudging you gently out of the way as they crawl past you.

“My turn, love? Nice of you to let me go before you.” They blow Gavin a kiss, and if you weren’t looking closely, you might have missed his little smile as he catches it out of the air and presses it over his heart. “Doesn’t mean I’m not going to win.”

Vincent, coming around your other side, a stray pillow in his arms. “Please. You really think you can beat me?”

“Oh, I know we can. Can’t we, lovely?” A cheeky wink, fast as lightning, tossed over their shoulder as they swing their legs over the side of the bed, kneeling down in front of you. “Over here, sweetness.”

“Prove it, then. Put your money where your mouth is, deviant, and then we’ll see.” Gavin takes up Freelancer’s earlier position behind you once you’re nice and comfortable on the edge of the mattress - you jump slightly as two quick fingers swoop down to brush between your legs, and he giggles as he brings them up to his mouth to taste. “Mmm, as good as I remember.”

“‘Prove it’? With pleasure, love.” The look in their eyes is positively wicked, and Gavin pulls them in for a harsh kiss as Vincent hops down to join them, slipping the pillow under their knees before they settle in front of you with a slow smile. “I think I like the look of right here…”

Their tongue is deliciously warm, one long, eager lick all the way up before they dive right in, teasing and swallowing and sucking until you can’t look, throwing your head mindlessly back against Gavin’s shoulder. His hold is comfortably tight as you buck and tremble against Freelancer’s face, grinding himself against your lower back, murmuring gently in your ear as if to soothe your struggling, although you both know that his words are anything but calming.

“Put your legs over their shoulders, sweetie, that’s it. You can - yeah, there you go. They won’t break, it’s okay…” Freelancer looks up at you as Gavin helps you adjust your legs, and just the sight of them is enough to make you whine - their lips and chin all shiny and slick, pupils blown wide, meeting your gaze as they twirl their tongue just - nng! - just right. Vincent, leisurely perched on the floor next to them, watches you too as his hands trace down their sides, and their moan as his fingers dip between their legs ripples through your body like a wave breaking.

They tap Gavin’s ankle twice with their free hand, and you know exactly what that means - he reaches around you to tenderly pull them closer, closer, his hand around the back of their head. The angle is obscenely good, that sticky, filthy kiss - you’re completely lost in the thick, indulgent haze of pleasure, rocking shamelessly against them and scrabbling at the sheets every time Vincent makes them gasp against your heated skin.

“Mm, I think you’re close, pretty thing…” Somehow, the room feels even hotter than before. Behind you, Gavin sighs headily as you roll your hips and his cock presses against your back, one hand pulling Freelancer impossibly closer to you, his voice like honey in your ear as your breath gets shorter and shorter.

“That’s it, little lovely. Oh, you’re going to make a mess, aren’t you? Gonna get Freelancer’s pretty face all messy?” It’s so much. Their tongue, their fingers, their breathless little moans. More, more, please. “Mm, you are good - you know how much they like it sloppy. Feel that? Yeah? Oh, I bet you do. Show them, there you go.” He turns your face to kiss you, hard and deep, and you can’t help it, please, please-!

“Show my deviant how much you like their mouth on you.”

And you do - crying out, your hands fly to their shoulders, shuddering through your orgasm while they work you through it, bowing forward over them and gasping for air as electricity licks up your spine and pools under your skin. Vincent cups your jaw, thumb stroking softly across your cheek, and you lean into his touch with a dazed smile and a broken moan.

Freelancer gives you one last little kiss, sweet and sensual, pulling away before they can push you too far into overstimulation. They sit back to admire their handiwork and grin widely, all teeth, licking their lips approvingly.

“Did I win?” A mischievous wink, that has Vincent groaning in faux-disappointment and Gavin choking out a laugh, warm palms running up and down your arms.

“Oh, deviant. I really have taught you well, haven’t I?”

Freelancer opens their mouth to respond, but Vincent beats them to it, pushing himself up off the floor and sitting down on the edge of the bed next to you and Gavin. “Still with us, hmm?”

“Mm-hmm,” you reply, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face in him, listening to the others sorting themselves out around you. “Thirsty.”

“Thirsty, okay. Blood or water, baby?”

“Water,” you mumble, and there’s a dull thump as Gavin’s hydro flask lands on the bed next to you. Vincent flicks the straw top up as he passes it to you, supporting the bottom of the metal bottle as you sip. “Mm, thank you.”

“Still good to keep going? Or shall we call it a day?” Wonderful, beautiful, angel Vincent - always so kind, always so good to you. “It’s up to you, tianxin. How are we feeling?”

You take a minute to think about it, watching Gavin sit back against Vincent’s other side and beckon Freelancer over for cuddles, laying them against his chest and resting his chin on top of their head. Neither of them speak, but the soft sounds and occasional giggles coming from their general direction probably mean that Gavin’s speaking to them telepathically - if you squint, you can just about see the faint disturbance in the air where his horns should be, the cloaking magic relaxing slightly as he concentrates on their silent conversation. Your hand slips past Vincent’s waist to hold Freelancer’s, threading your fingers with theirs, and they give you a gentle, easy smile.

“I’m good,” you decide, squirming a bit in Vincent’s hold as you stretch out some of the built-up tension in your back, your shoulders, your legs - you definitely enjoyed building that tension, but it’s nice to chase out the pleasant ache in your calves as you experimentally flex and point your feet. “Still want one more, I think.” Gavin turns his head to peek over Vincent’s shoulder at you, and you give him a lazy little wave with your free hand. “I was promised one from each of you, you know.”

“Sure? You know it’s okay to say no, honey.”

“Yeah, I know,” You tip your head to the side and kiss along his jaw, soaking up the way he melts a little more each time your lips meet his skin. “I love you.”

“I love you too, xingan.” He gives in to your touch, tipping your chin up to kiss you properly before nudging Gavin lightly in the side, kissing his temple as the incubus leans over to you. “Take good care of my lovely, won’t you?”

“Of course I will, Vincent, darling,” The words are innocent, but the look on his face is anything but. “I always do. Don’t I, precious?” The last bit is directed at you, and you nod enthusiastically as he lays you out on the bed next to where Freelancer is sitting cross-legged. “We have fun together all the time.”

He taps your cheek softly with one hand and you eagerly open your mouth, eyes closing dreamily as you close your lips around graceful fingers, hot pink nail polish smooth against your tongue. Alas, he takes them back far too soon, but you don’t have time to mourn the loss for long - Freelancer slowly guides your legs apart to let Gavin press his fingers inside you, making sure you’re nice and stretched out for him. His pace is slow, and you relax into the sensation, knowing that you’ll need it.

Vincent, for his part, shifts up to sit by the headboard, propping your head and shoulders up against his hip and idly resting one hand across your chest, comforting contact over your heart. Freelancer gives him a questioning look, pointedly glancing down to where he’s still hard, but he shakes his head. “I can take care of it, sweetness. I’d rather - haahh - I’d rather watch.” He hisses as his hand wraps around his cock, smearing precum across the sensitive skin, and you feel him shake slightly underneath you, arching into the slick friction. “Give me something nice to look at?”

Gavin, now knuckle-deep inside you, pouts up at him in mock-offense. “Rude. Are we not a nice enough sight?” He curls his fingers slightly, just a little more pressure, and the rush of heat makes your hands fly up to cling to Vincent’s body behind you. “Guess we’ll have to try a little harder, won’t we, precious?”

You’re not really listening, eyes locked on Freelancer as their head tips back with a pleased groan, leaning back on one arm as the other hand dances down their body, finally slipping between their legs just as they wink at you. “Gavin asked you a question, sweetheart. You going to - mmm - to try nice and hard for us?”

“Hmm? Yeah, yeah…” Anything, just please get on with it. You’re so empty. “Want it harder, please…”

It’s the right answer - at last, Gavin decides you’re prepped enough and spreads your legs a little wider, crawling up your body as he lines himself up. “Think you’re ready? I think you might be,” he purrs, brushing his lips against yours in a not-quite kiss. “You’re practically drooling, darling, and I haven’t even started yet.”

It’s torture, feeling the head of his cock pressing against you but not quite pushing inside, and in your frustration you can’t help but whine desperately, begging for the pleasure you know he can give you. The sound makes Freelancer shudder, fingers working faster, and Vincent gathers your wrists in his free hand at Gavin’s cue, giving them a reassuring squeeze.

“It’s alright, it’s alright,” A proper kiss this time, Gavin’s tongue brushing slowly over your fangs as he swallows your needy whimpers. “Breathe, little lovely, and take it all for me.”

His cock finally pushes into you, heavy and thick and dripping, and you can see Vincent’s affectionate little smile above you as your eyes go wide, before Gavin rocks his hips to press the last few inches inside and they slam closed with a silent gasp. He gives you a minute to adjust, but you don’t really need all of it - before long, you’re pleading frantically, half-formed words encouraging him to fuck you properly.

“Ahh - honey, you - ohh…” His pace is fast and just the right side of rough, that perfect friction, that wonderful fullness that he knows you need. It’s hard to focus on anything but him, hot and breathless above you, moaning into your mouth as your kisses turn sloppy and the heat low in your stomach builds and builds. “So - so good…”

“...Freelancer?” Next to you, Freelancer’s cry catches in their chest, and you can tell that they’re almost there. Vincent’s still holding your wrists above your head so you can’t really touch them, sweet nothings that you don’t really hear falling out of his mouth, but they seem to register your voice, blinking heavy eyelids open as they try to meet your gaze. “Please, I - yesyesyes - please, wanna see you- haahh-” Their breathing is sharp and short, just a little more and they’ll give in. “Freelancer, want it, I need - please, please, wanna watch you cum, wanna see-!”

They don’t scream, but it’s close - they arch forwards, keening as they finally snap, and Gavin’s pace stutters as the feeling of their orgasm washes over him, horns flickering into existence for just a second over your head as he loses concentration. The sight of them is almost too much, slumped down on the bed, panting and sweaty and giddy with release, and you hear Vincent swear through his teeth behind you as they give one slightly-shaky hand to Gavin, letting him lick their fingers clean before gently flicking the hair out of his face. It’s achingly sweet, even as he fucks you deeper and deeper into the mattress, even as Freelancer ducks their head behind you where you can’t see and you hear the unmistakable sound of them swallowing around Vincent’s cock-

“You - ahh!” He stumbles over the words, slim fingers flexing against your skin as Freelancer buries their face in his lap, moaning around his cock, and his mindless babble gradually focuses in your mind as you start to reach fever pitch. “Lovely, you look - nng, please! - oh, fuck, lovely-!” He lets go of one of your hands, letting you slide it downwards to play with yourself as Gavin spreads your legs even wider, reaching impossibly, wonderfully deeper inside you.

“It’s - hahh - you like it, don’t you?” Your head is spinning, giddy with sensation and desire and heat, and all you can give Vincent is a fucked-out whine in reply. “Yeah? Is that it, lovely? It is, isn’t it - I think you like it when Gavin fucks you like this, don’t you?” He asks and you can’t reply, but you do, you do, you do. “When he holds your legs nice and wide, stretching you out, filling you up… Look down, honey, there it is - feel that? Feel how full he makes you feel?”

It’s nearly enough to have you sobbing - Vincent’s heady, heavy words swimming through your dazed mind, Gavin’s broken gasps above you, warmth and weight and moremoremore until you’re nothing but a writhing, pleading mess, needing them, needing this.

“You’ve done so well, xingan, so good, so good, all for us,” he chokes, voice cracking beautifully as you hear Freelancer get faster, and you know he won’t last much longer. “My lovely, my - nng! - my sweet little lovely, honey, please - let him, show me, show me, let him make you feel good, that’s it - fuck! Cum for him, cum for me, let me see it, let me see my lovely, that’s it - baby, please-!”

You can’t tell for sure, but this time, you think you might actually scream - the pleasure swallows you whole, white-hot and wanting, and your free arm shoots up to wrap around Gavin’s back and pull him flush against you, inescapable. He’s heart-stoppingly beautiful above you, eyes screwed shut and mouth dropping open with a curse and a loud cry. Vaguely, you feel him tremble through his own orgasm, pleasant warmth spreading inside you, and the pair of you lie draped over Vincent’s side in an exhausted heap, listening to his low hiss as his cum fills Freelancer’s mouth.

At last, the room is finally still. The four of you stay there for a little while, catching your breath, and although it’s still hot, it’s not entirely unpleasant. Vincent hasn’t let go of your wrist, thumb idly running back and forth over your pulse, and you’re more than happy to just flop against him, totally blissed-out and utterly content.

Eventually, Gavin breaks the silence, huffing under his breath as he lifts his head and beckons Freelancer closer to him. “Messy thing,” he laughs quietly, tenderly brushing away some of the stickiness around their lips and kissing away the rest. “Didn’t anyone ever teach you not to play with your food?”

“You certainly didn’t,” they retort in faux-offence, although the gentle look in their eyes, marshmallow-soft and gooey, betrays them. “In fact, I think you said you’d…”

“Lovely?” Vincent’s hand on your shoulder distracts you from Gavin and Freelancer’s playful teasing, and you soften into his touch as he shifts beneath you, letting him pull you up so you’re properly lying on his chest. “There you are. How are you feeling, tianxin?”

“Really, really good,” you sigh airily, squishing your face against his warm skin and enjoying the quiet thump of his heartbeat. “Thank you.”

“No need to thank me, baby,” he says, mumbling into your temple as he kisses your forehead. “I’m just glad you had fun. You did so well, and I’m so, so proud of you.” Your heart flutters at the affection in his words, and if you thought you could move your legs, you’d tackle him backwards and wrap him up in a great big hug - as it is, you settle for a pleased hum of acknowledgement and a soft kiss on his collarbone. There’ll be time for cuddles in a minute.

It’s quiet again, comfortable silence in the dim light, and in that long moment you know you were definitely right earlier. You must have been a saint in a past life to deserve all this.

(Well, it’s sort of quiet.)

“So,” Gavin starts, beaming widely and not-at-all innocently, throwing you a quick wink as a graceful hand neatly brushes his hair out of his face. You can’t help but smile back, watching Freelancer roll their eyes fondly and feeling more than hearing Vincent’s quiet snickering under your head. “Same time next week, then?”

masterlist

this is an original work by @gingerbreadmonsters - please do not repost or misattribute

#redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted smut #redacted vincent #redacted gavin #redacted lovely #redacted freelancer #redacted fluff #ginger writes #gingerbreadmonsters #ginger after dark

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transmisogyny-explained · 3 years ago

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Hey, i'm transmasc and i've been trying to educate myself on transmisogynism for just a week so i don't know a lot, sorry if some things i ask are evident. Hm about your last reblog, i've got questions about the word "femboy", i went through your carrd and what you already posted about that, as well as other sources but i still don't get it fully. Outside of tumblr nothing states anything about it being transmis but then i've never heard of transmisogynism before coming on tumblr so maybe that's why. Anyways, i've been identifying as such because well, i'm a feminine masc-aligned individual, the same way a masculine fem-aligned person would identify as tomboy. So first question, should i switch for tomgirl? Would that label be ok (or do you know any other, cause tbh having "girl" in a label is not very comfy)? Second question is just the origine of the word, it was created to mock cis feminine men (from what i understand), trans women have nothing to do with that, so why would it be transmis? I don't undersand that ^^' Thank you for your time, and your blog in general, it's really helpful!

Sorry for taking so long. I feel like I’m struggling with answering this ask because I want to give you a substantive answer, but much of what I have to say has already been said before. I’ll give it my best anyway, but I hope you don’t mind me referencing other posts you’ve probably already read.

1. Yes, there are of other ways to describe yourself as a feminine boy. You could use femme or GNC or lavender boy. Some people have created new gender terms altogether for describing feminine boyhood such as rosboy or feminec.

2. It was not created to mock cis feminine men. It has been historically used derisively against people who are perceived as effeminate. While this includes cis feminine men, it also includes transfems because we are also seen as effeminate, having “failed at being men.” People who are bigoted towards GNC men are very unlikely to be accepting and respectful towards trans people in general.

3. Even if the word was created specifically to mock GNC men, it would still be partially rooted in transmisogyny (though misdirected) because transmisogyny is a manifestation of patriarchy. Maleness and masculinity are seen as superior to femaleness and femininity under patriarchy, so transmisogyny is one way in which patriarchy punishes those who transgress this paradigm. The stigma against GNC men is a part of how this system reinforces itself.

4. Regardless of where the term actually originates from, it is currently used online in porn as a way to demean, fetishize, and misgender transfems, very similarly to how “tr*nny” and “sh*male” are used. That alone gives it a transmisogynistic connotation.

6. Furthermore, the way the word has been turned into a meme also shows a pattern of transmisogynistic fetishism. In particular, the characters which the word is often applied to are seen as sexually enticing (particularly by cis men) for the perceived “discordance” between a feminine appearance/expression and the possession of a penis, very similar to how “tr*ps” and “f*ta” are viewed. Again, this alone gives it a transmisogynistic connotation.

6. Obviously, Tumblr shouldn’t be the only place where you learn about transmisogyny or interact with trans women, etc. But the thing that’s kind of great about social media is that it gives us, transfems, a platform of our own, a space to talk about our experiences. And, really, that is the best way of learning about transmisogyny, just by listening to us when we talk about these sorts of things.

7. Personally, I really don’t care if you identify with the term. All I ask is that you be aware of its transmisogynistic roots.

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newdougsblog · 4 years ago

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The Tragic Hero Full of Fear

Hello everyone! Before I get into this, I’d like to thank @jasontoddiefor for both the name and being the main enabler of this fun piece of writing. I also want to thank all my wonderful friends over on Discord for letting me bounce ideas off of them and helping me. You are all amazing!!

Ok, so let’s get into it!

The first six Star Wars movies (the Original and Prequel trilogies) are commonly referred to as “the Tragedy of Darth Vader.” But what makes these movies a tragedy? How is Anakin Skywalker himself, the main character of said tragedy, a tragic hero? In this meta/essay, I will discuss how Anakin himself is definitionally a tragic hero and outline his story as it relates to the structure of a classic Greek tragedy.

This essay will focus solely on Anakin’s character as he is canonically portrayed.

The Hero

Let’s go through the main traits of a tragic hero (as per early literature) and discuss them in the context of Anakin Skywalker.

Possesses immense courage and strength and is usually favored by the gods

Anakin’s courage is evident throughout his entire life, such as when he participates in the pod race in TPM or on the front lines during the Clone Wars.

While we cannot definitively ascribe Anakin’s abilities to any deity, we can associate them with the Force. The Force is able to somewhat influence the happenings of the universe in certain ways and takes the place of any sort of deity.

Whether Anakin is the “Chosen One” or not, his connection to the Force is stronger than that of any other Force-sensitive being, so he is consequently closer to it than most, if not all, other Force-sensitive beings.

Extreme loyalty to family and country

Anakin is consistent in his demonstrations of loyalty to those he has strong feelings for (whether those feelings be romantic or platonic).

His devotion to Padmé surpasses his loyalty to the Jedi, and he is always willing to go to great lengths to ensure their safety and well-being.

Anakin also exhibits a strong sense of devotion to his mother, Shmi. His devotion to her, and by extension her wellbeing, surpasses his duties as Jedi.

In ROTS, Anakin says, “I will not betray the Republic… my loyalties lie with the Chancellor and with the Senate… and with you” (you, in this case, referring to Padmé). In this quotation, Anakin’s loyalties are made quite clear. At this point, he is not faithful to the Jedi, but to his government, its leaders, and, of course, his wife.

Representative of society’s current values

During the Clone Wars, Anakin is known by the moniker, “the Hero with No Fear,” and is one of the Republic’s “poster boys.” He is charismatic, kind, seemingly fearless (obviously) and a strong fighter, thus representing the values that were important to the Republic at the time. The last characteristic is especially important because of the assurance it instills in times of war. As a representation of the Republic, Anakin’s prowess on the battlefield creates hope for its citizens that victory is possible.

Anakin also empathizes with the opinion that the seemingly outdated Jedi Code holds them back. In the Citadel Arc, Tarkin remarks that “the Jedi Code prevents [the Jedi] from going far enough to achieve victory.” Anakin actually agrees with this statement, replying that “[he’s] also found that [the Jedi] sometimes fall short of victory because of [their] methods” (Season 3, Episode 19). He shows a sense of allegiance not to the ancient ways of the Jedi, but to the newer, more modern ideals regarding military action.

Anakin claims to have brought “peace, justice, freedom, and security” to his “new Empire.” While the Empire's interpretations of the aforementioned values are skewed, Anakin continues to represent them as Darth Vader.

Anakin’s statement to Obi-Wan also mirrors Palpatine’s declaration to the Senate: “In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire, for a safe and secure society which I assure you will last for ten thousand years.” The people applaud this statement, demonstrating a general sense of exhaustion in regards to the war and a yearning for what this new Empire is promising them.

Lead astray/challenged by strong feelings

Though there are many, many examples of Anakin’s emotions getting the better of him, we’re simply going to list two:

Anakin’s fury and anguish after the death of his mom leads to his slaughter of the Tuskens

Anakin’s overwhelming fear of losing Padmé is ultimately what leads to his Fall.

Every tragic hero possesses what is called a hamartia, or a fatal flaw. This trait largely contributes to the hero’s catastrophic downfall. Anakin’s hamartia is his need for control, which partially manifests through his fear of loss.

Let’s explore this idea in more detail.

Though Anakin grows up as a slave, the movies neglect to explicitly cover the trauma left from his time in slavery. However, it is worth noting that slaves did not have the ability to make many choices for themselves; they didn’t even own their bodies. After being freed, Anakin is whisked away to become a Jedi. He does not possess much control over his life as Jedi, for he is simply told what path he is going to take. While Anakin does make this decision on his own, becoming a Jedi is a disciplined and somewhat-strict way of life and not one that allows for an abundance of reckless autonomy as he is wont to engage in.

(Side note: I’m not here to argue about Qui-Gon’s decision-making abilities, nor do I wish to engage in discourse regarding the Jedi’s way of life. I am simply presenting and objectively stating these facts in relation to Anakin because they are pertinent to my point.)

During AOTC, Anakin is unable to save his mother from death. As Shmi dies in his arms, Anakin is absolutely helpless. The situation is completely out of his control, and he is forced to contend with the reality that despite all of his power, he cannot control everything that happens.

He also feels that he has a larger potential for power and is being held back by Obi-Wan: “although I'm a Padawan learner, in some ways... a lot of ways... I'm ahead of him. I'm ready for the trials. I know I am! He knows it too. He believes I'm too unpredictable… I know I started my training late... but he won't let me move on.” Anakin believes Obi-Wan, his teacher and mentor, is holding him back. He expresses a self-held conviction of his status and skills and does not trust the word of his superior.

In ROTS, Anakin starts dreaming of Padmé’s death. Considering what occurred the last time he dreamt of a loved one’s demise, Anakin is justifiably (or at least justifiably from his point of view) worried. He consequently wants to stop these dreams from coming true in any way possible. His fear of death, especially that of his loved ones, represents his need for control over everything, even things that are uncontrollable. This overwhelming desire leads to Anakin’s drastic actions.

As Darth Vader, he no longer possesses such fears, for everyone that he loved is either dead or has betrayed him. He is the epitome of order and control, eliminating any who disturb this perceived equilibrium.

However, this changes because of one person: Luke Skywalker.

Luke reintroduces something that was (arguably) long-absent in Vader’s life, which is interpersonal attachment. Vader yearns for his son to join him by his side. When Luke refuses, Vader continues to attempt to seek him out. In ROTJ, Vader is forced to choose between the Emperor, a man he has long trusted and followed, and Luke, the son he never knew he had. Out of a desire to protect and keep what little family he has left (and likely a sense of “I couldn’t save Padmé but at least I can save her legacy by keeping her child(ren) alive and safe”), Vader defeats the Emperor and saves his son. Though his actions are definitionally heroic, Anakin never truly overcomes his hamartia.

The Structure of a Tragedy

Classic Greek tragedies follow a specific story structure, which, according to the German playwright Gustav Freytag, is as follows:

We’re going to focus on the three aspects that best represent Anakin’s story as a tragedy: The peripeteia, the anagnorisis, and the catastrophe/denouement. These occur during and/or after the climax.

The peripeteia is the climax/the turning point in the plot. Said change usually involves the protagonist's good luck and prosperity taking a turn for the worse.

Within the tragedy we are discussing, the peripeteia occurs when Anakin chooses Sidious over Mace Windu and solidifies his allegiance to the Dark side, becoming the very thing he swore to destroy. It is at this point that things really start to go downhill. He kills children, chokes his wife, fights his best friend, gets his remaining limbs cut off, etc.

The anagnorisis is the point in the tragedy when the protagonist recognizes their error, seeing the true nature of that which they were previously ignorant of, usually regarding their circumstances or a specific relationship (such as Oedipus’ realization that his wife was actually his mother). In most tragedies, the anagnorisis is in close proximity to the peripeteia. In Anakin’s story, the anagnorisis occurs during ROTJ. After being wounded in his fight against Luke, Vader watches as his son is brutally electrocuted by Sidious. It is at this moment that Darth Vader realizes that Luke was right—there is good in him, and he still has the chance to redeem himself.

The catastrophe/denouement (since this is a tragedy, we’re going to go with “catastrophe”) is the end of the tragedy. Events and conflicts are resolved and brought to a close, and a new sort of “normality” is established. The catastrophe often provides a sense of catharsis (release of tension) for the viewer. The protagonist is worse off than they were at the beginning of the tragedy.

The catastrophe within “The Tragedy of Darth Vader” transpires soon after the anagnorisis at the end of ROTJ. Though the realization of his capacity for good is the anagnorisis, the follow-through (via his actions), as well as what consequently occurs, is the catastrophe. As previously discussed, Vader saves Luke by killing the Emperor but does so at the cost of his own life. This serves as the resolution of the tragedy, for the hero’s fate has been confirmed—Darth Vader fulfills his destined role as the Chosen One and, in doing so, brings about his own redemption and dies as Anakin Skywalker.

In conclusion, the categorization of Star Wars as a tragedy is a choice that heavily influences Anakin, the protagonist and hero, of the story. He is without a doubt a tragic hero whose fatal flaw leads to his downfall. In accordance with Aristotle’s theory of tragedy, Anakin’s tragedy is constructed not by personal agency, but by the narrative itself.

Works Cited

“Darth Vader.” Wikipedia, Wikimedia Foundation, 15 Mar. 2021, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darth_Vader.

“Dramatic Structure.” Wikipedia, Wikimedia Foundation, 20 Feb. 2021, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dramatic_structure.

“Hero.” Encyclopaedia Britannica, Encyclopaedia Britannica, Inc., 19 Oct. 2016, www.britannica.com/art/hero-literary-and-cultural-figure.

Lucas, George, director. Star Wars: Episode III— Revenge of the Sith. Lucasfilm Ltd., 2005.

Lucas, George, director. Star Wars: Episode II— Attack of the Clones. Lucasfilm Ltd. , 2002.

Michnovetz, Matt. “Star Wars: The Clone Wars, ‘Counterattack.’” Season 3, episode 19, 4 Mar. 2011.

“Sophocles: the Purest Artist.” Encyclopædia Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica, Inc., www.britannica.com/art/tragedy-literature/Sophocles-the-purest-artist.

“Theory of Tragedy.” Encyclopædia Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica, Inc., www.britannica.com/art/tragedy-literature/Theory-of-tragedy.

“Tragic Hero.” Dictionary.com, Dictionary.com, www.dictionary.com/browse/tragic-hero.

#star wars #Anakin Skywalker #greek tragedy #anakin the tragic hero #meta #so many meta ideas not enough time #wow thanks tumblr formatting for being terrible

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catonline878 · 2 years ago

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21st Anniversary of mgs2

There are three different ways I have tried to explain Metal Gear Solid 2 to other people in my life in an attempt to get them to understand my love for it. One narrative I tell is "a cowboy possessed by the ghost of his ex-boyfriend's son betrays and tries to kill the former president of the United States (who is in a Doctor Octopus suit and dual wielding sci-fi katanas named "Democrat" and "Republican") using a giant robot". This is a true fact about the game, makes a funny story, and is hilarious every time. Another narrative I tell is a shitty, emotionally dishonest philosophical reading of the game or a vague metaphor for the effect that it had on me. Finally, I have been, on occasion, typically on late night Discord calls where all members are too tired to hold up barriers, been brave enough to tell the truth of what this silly little spy game is to me. Metal Gear Solid 2 is the most game of my adolescence ever. I have spent my childhood and many of my teenage years blending into a person that I should be, I should be a straight, cisgender, Christian man who is nothing but quiet and respectful and whose opinions are informed strictly by those around them. A person who dresses in jeans and a t-shirt because its inoffensive and masculine. A person who holds the things they feel in their heart and the things they hear in church in contention with each other in their head forever unresolved. A person who nods their head at everything their parents say about American politics. MGS2 was not the beginning of my individuation as a person, I played it when I was 16 it'd be real bad if that hadn't started earlier, but what it did do was turn it into a mission statement and something I actively strive for. Raiden's journey towards self-definition, presented in a manner that only video games could present, is simply one of the coolest things ever done in a video game. Comparing the clash between the illusory freedom of action video games have and their inherently restricted rulesets to the way that wider systems of cultural control box how we can define our own identities is simply the coolest meta shit ever. When I showed the game to my friend once she joked after seeing its ending in which Raiden is asked to choose his own name, "of course you, who is in a different state with questioning their gender every 3 weeks thinks this is like the best game ever". Was a little out of pocket, but also probably the simplest and most genuine TLDR this post could have. Thank you Metal Gear Solid 2, now for the love of god please make the game accessible on modern consoles, I personally have access to 2 copies of the game so I’m good to go but the fact that the general public can't play it unless they own outdated hardware or are “in the know” makes me immensely sad.

#metal gear solid 2 #metal gear solid

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non-binarybuddhist · 3 years ago

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Buddhism Basics: The Sixteen Bodhisattva Precepts, The Four Noble Truths and The Noble Eightfold Path.

Here we will be looking at the Sixteen Bodhisattva Precepts, The Four Noble Truths, and The Noble Eightfold Path. The basis of most schools of Mahayana Buddhism. Mahayana Buddhism is a giant umbrella term that characterizes many schools of thought in Buddhism. In contrast to the Theravada Buddhism thought. In Mahayana we instill in ourselves the Bodhisattva path to help other sentient beings reach enlightenment, where as in Theravada thought the highest goal is that of Ahratship, or one who has released themselves from the fetters of existence and becomes a non-returner. Where as in Mahayana Buddhism one seeks the path of the Bodhisattva to lead others to the path of enlightenment. Many Bodhisattvas will chose to remain in the cycle of rebirth out of compassion for sentient beings. Where the goal of the Ahrat is to solely become a non-returner through the teachings of Shakyamuni Buddha alone. Here is a simplified overview of the Bodhisattva Precepts, the goal of Mahayana Buddhism. The Four Noble Truths and The Noble Eightfold Path. The Four Noble Truths and the Noble Eightfold Path are essential to all schools of Buddhism regardless of tradition where it be Mahayana, Theravada or Vajrayana.

Sixteen Bodhisattva Precepts

Taking refuge in the Buddha

Taking refuge in the Dharma

Taking refuge in the Sangha

Do not create Evil

Practice Good

Actualize Good For Others

Respect life – Do not kill

Be giving – Do not steal

Honor the body – Do not misuse sexuality

Manifest truth – Do not lie

Proceed clearly – Do not cloud the mind

See the perfection – Do not speak of others' errors and faults

Realize self and others as one – Do not elevate the self and blame others

Give generously – Do not be withholding

Actualize harmony – Do not be angry

Experience the intimacy of things – Do not defile the Three Treasures

The Four Noble Truths

Dukkha (suffering, incapable of satisfying, painful) is an innate characteristic of existence in the realm of samsara.

Samudaya (origin, arising) of this dukkha, which arises or "comes together" with taṇhā ("craving, desire or attachment").

Nirodha (cessation, ending) of this dukkha can be attained by the renouncement or letting go of this taṇhā.

Magga (path, Noble Eightfold Path) is the path leading to renouncement of tanha and cessation of dukkha.

The Noble Eightfold Path

The eight Buddhist practices in the Noble Eightfold Path are:

Right View: our actions have consequences, death is not the end, and our actions and beliefs have consequences after death. The Buddha followed and taught a successful path out of this world and the other world (heaven and underworld/hell). Later on, the right view came to explicitly include karma and rebirth, and the importance of the Four Noble Truths, when "insight" became central to Buddhist soteriology.

Right Resolve or Intention: the giving up of home and adopting the life of a religious mendicant in order to follow the path; this concept aims at peaceful renunciation, into an environment of non-sensuality, non-ill-will (to loving kindness), away from cruelty (to compassion). Such an environment aids contemplation of impermanence, suffering, and non-Self.

Right Speech: no lying, no rude speech, no telling one person what another says about him to cause discord or harm their relationship.

Right Conduct or Action: no killing or injuring, no taking what is not given, no sexual acts, no material desires.

Right Livelihood: beg to feed, only possessing what is essential to sustain life.

Right Effort: preventing the arising of unwholesome states, and generating wholesome states, the bojjhagā (seven factors of awakening). This includes indriya-samvara, "guarding the sense-doors", restraint of the sense faculties.

Right Mindfulness (sati; Satipatthana; Sampajañña): "retention", being mindful of the dhammas ("teachings", "elements") that are beneficial to the Buddhist path. In the vipassana movement, sati is interpreted as "bare attention": never be absent minded, being conscious of what one is doing; this encourages the awareness of the impermanence of body, feeling and mind, as well as to experience the five aggregates (skandhas), the five hindrances, the four True Realities and seven factors of awakening.

Right samadhi (Passaddhi; Ekaggata; sampasadana): practicing four stages of dhyāna ("meditation"), which includes samadhi proper in the second stage, and reinforces the development of the bojjhagā, culminating into upekkha (equanimity) and mindfulness. In the Theravada tradition and the Vipassana movement, this is interpreted as ekaggata, concentration or one-pointedness of the mind, and supplemented with Vipassana-meditation, which aims at insight.

***Amida Nyorai and their 25 Bodhisattva attendants descending from Gokuraku-Jodo to lead the departed back to the Western Pure Land.***

#jodo shu buddhism #japanese buddhism #buddhist #buddha #mahayana #bodhisattva #buddhism

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unforth · 5 years ago

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List of Differences Between MDZS and CQL/Untamed

I haven’t seen a comprehensive list of differences between the Modao Zushi novel and Chengqingling/The Untamed. Someone in one of my Discord’s asked earlier today, and in reply, myself, Joythea, @floofz, HeadphonesGal, and mustache apologist compiled this list, based on what we remembered. I’ve reproduced that list here with permission of the people involved in the conversation. I’ve tried to include what happens in both the novel AND CQL for each item, but in general, the list was more written as, “here are things that happened in CQL that didn’t happen or happened differently in the novel,” with an eye toward explaining it to someone familiar with the novel but not with the live action adaptation.

Note that this contains...like...all the spoilers. Also, I am not an expert on either the novel or the live action, though I’m better acquainted with the second. As a group we did our best to make sure this was accurate, but I’ve transcribed and expanded it for posting and I can’t promise I haven’t made mistakes. PLEASE CORRECT ME IF I’M WRONG and I will amend it (that’s why I used a read more - so I can make changes without it getting all messed up by reblogs of different versions)!

General Concept/Overarching Differences:

Death, Fierce Corpses, and Puppets: Censorship means that none of the things they hunt in the Untamed are actually dead. Once, they’re even able to explicitly “free” a group of controlled puppets and they revert to being regular people. At times this means certain events are...extremely poorly...explained, such as what happens to Wen Ning, where it’s never explicitly said that he’s dead - it’s instead implied that Wen Ning was on the verge of death and that Wei Wuxian controlled him and was able to save him. However, though it’s never explicit that there are essentially zombies in CQL, it would be difficult to explain events by any other interpretation. Much like with homosexuality, they flirt as close to what the censors will allows as they can and allow a viewer to infer from there.

The Yin Iron: In the novel, there is no Yin Iron. Wen Ruohan’s motivation for his actions is simply more power and is entirely “human.” The Wen don’t do demonic cultivation. Xue Yang doesn’t have a piece of the Yin Iron, and his ancestor didn’t create it (obviously, since it doesn’t exist). In the novel, the “Founder of Demonic Cultivation” is clearly meant to be Wei Wuxian, whereas if the concept of “Modao Zushi” ever came up in the Untamed it would be ambiguous at best who was being referred to, since both Xue Yang’s ancestor and Wen Ruohan could theoretically deserve the title. Since there is no Yin Iron, many of the things ascribed to the Yin Iron obviously don’t happen, nor does it drive the plot in the “past,” nor does it play a part in the death of Xuanwu, nor is it what Wei Wuxian uses to craft the Stygian Tiger Amulet.

While this isn’t explicit, it seems (at least to me) like everyone is a few years older in CQL than they are in the novel. For example, in the novel, the Lectures start when the young cultivators are all 15 - 16 years old. That...doesn’t really fit with how they look in CQL? I personally think they’re more like 17 - 18 in CQL, and then events proceed from there. However, their ages aren’t stated in CQL canon so this is open to interpretation.

Technically, WangXian is subtext in the Untamed, by the slimmest of obfuscations. Seriously, it’s so borderline to being canon that calling it subtext is slightly ridiculous but since it’s never ACTUALLY explicit...I guess that makes it subtext. Also, ya know, there’s porn in the novel.

Characters and Characterizations:

Mo Xuanyu: Mo Xuanyu isn’t gay in the Untamed, unlike in the novel. In the novel, it’s said that Mo Xuanyu falls out of favor with the Jin clan because he’s made inappropriate sexual advances on Jin Guangyao. In the Untamed, the implication is that he made similar advances on Qin Su. In both, it’s also implied these weren’t the real reasons but it’s also never explained what actually did happen. Also, in the novel, he favors wearing thickly caked makeup to obscure his appearance (and subsequently Wei Wuxian does the same) whereas in CQL while makeup is mentioned he’s basically only ever shown or discussed as wearing a mask.

Wei Wuxian/Mo Xuanyu: In the novel, Mo Xuanyu sacrifices himself and Wei Wuxian takes over his body. However, in the Untamed, Wei Wuxian is more...reborn?...whole, in his own appearance (the logistics of this, or if he was ever dead, or where he was if he WAS dead, are never explained). He wears a mask because if he didn’t, everyone would (and ultimately does) recognize him.

Wei Wuxian: In the novel, doing demonic cultivation clearly twists Wei Wuxian and some of his actions are either accidental but still his fault, or intentional. For example, the torture of Wen Chao is intentional and brutal, and the loss of control of Wen Ning at Qiongqi Path is accidental but still his fault - a result of his hubris and poor decisions. In CQL, a second flute is played at Qiongqi pass and also when Wei Wuxian fights the cultivation clans outside the Nightless City - both of the major times when Wei Wuxian ostensibly loses control. Though Wei Wuxian himself thinks it’s his fault, it’s actually not - the person responsible is Su She - and Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji eventually learn this. However, CQL does still show Wei Wuxian being changed by the resentment. His temper is more volatile and his trust more limited; for example, he loses his temper with A-Yuan at one point, which doesn’t happen in the novel.

Lan Wangji: differences in Lan Wangji’s characterization are a little harder to quantify but in general in CQL he seems more open/expressive/comfortable in his own skin, and less prone to anger. For example, when he steals Wei Wuxian’s first kiss on Phoenix Mountain in the novel, he loses his temper and destroys an entire grove of trees. This...would not be in character for Lan Wangji in CQL (and of course they don’t kiss in CQL). However, putting it in definitive terms is complicated. For another difference, in the novel, Lan Wangji confronts the cultivation clans to protect Wei Wuxian, and thus is given 33 strikes with the discipline whip. In CQL, his actions are more ambivalent in Wei Wuxian’s defense...certainly, he doesn’t stand against everyone else in a pitch to save Wei Wuxian’s life...but he’s still explicit enough for Lan Qiren, who has him beaten 300 times with a stave. (the end result is still “covered in scars,” just different punishments.)

Jiang Yanli: Jiang Yanli’s role is expanded from the novel. She accompanies her brothers to the Lan clan Lectures, and she carries a sword, implying she’s a cultivator, though she never uses it. The back-and-forth related to her engagement to Jin Zixuan is also expanded. Furthermore, she’s with her brothers when they flee Lotus Pier, and at Wen Qing’s outpost when they are in hiding, for at least part of the time. (but not enough of it to be involved in the Golden Core transfer). The overall result is that she feels much less “fridged” in CQL than she did in the novel (or at least, that’s how it felt to me - obviously, some of these bullet points are subjective to varying extents).

Luo “Mianmian” Qingyang: In the novel, she’s a member of an independent cultivation sect and she’s first introduced during the Wen Clan indoctrination. In the Untamed, she’s a Jin clan disciple and she attends the Lan clan Lectures, and is shown to have a good relationship (friendship, not romantic) with Jin Zixuan. She later renounces her membership in the Jin clan when the clans turn against Wei Wuxian after the end of the Sunshot Campaign.

Wen Ruohan: In the novel, he’s just a badass mo-fo power hungry pain in the ass. In CQL he is a demonic cultivating megalomaniac who uses the Yin Iron to be, like, Comic Book Evil.

Wen Qing and Wen Ning: Unlike in the novel, where Wen Ning is introduced outside of Lotus Pier, and Wen Qing is introduced after Wen Ning needs a place to hide Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian, in the Untamed, Wen Qing and Wen Ning attend the Lan clan Lectures. Wen Qing is there under instructions from Wen Ruohan to seek the Yin Iron; he blackmails her by threatening Wen Ning. Furthermore, Wen Ning is unusually susceptible to spiritual influence as a result of an encounter with the Dafan Mountain Goddess/Fairy statue when he’s a child. The statue kills their parents and starts to drain him, but Wen Qing saves him. She’s not able to heal the damage to him, though, and it’s implied this is part of why it’s possible for Wei Wuxian to raise him using demonic cultivation. Wen Qing in particular has a much greater role in CQL, and she has a romantic subplot with Jiang Cheng. She bears a sword, and she’s also shown to do spellwork and influence people using acupuncture needles.

Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen: In the novel, we first meet them at Yi City, when their story is already tragic. In CQL, they are introduced right after the Lan Lectures, and are therefore older.

Xue Yang: As with Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen, he is introduced earlier in CQL than in the novel. In CQL, he also possesses a piece of the Yin Iron that he manages to keep hidden and a secret despite multiple attempts by different parties to obtain it (it’s hinted at times that he’s in cahoots with Wei Wuxian, but this is just a character smear). His ancestor created the Yin Iron, and he’s known to be an expert on demonic cultivation.

Meng Yao/Jin Guangyao: Meng Yao is introduced much earlier in CQL than he is in the novel, as we see him when the Nie cultivators are welcomed to the Lan lectures (and we’re shown upfront and immediately that Lan Xichen treats him more respectfully than most others do). In the novel, we don’t find out much about the evil things he’s done until Wei Wuxian does Empathy on Nie Mingjue’s head; in CQL, more of that is shown “on screen” as it occurs. For example, he’s shown conspiring with Xue Yang in the Unclean Realm, and right after that is when Nie Mingjue catches him slaughtering another officer (which none of the other characters know about). He also saves Nie Mingjue’s life during that scene, painting him as morally ambiguous and complicated from a very early point. We also “see” as it happens the incident in right after the fall of Nightless City, where Nie Mingjue goes to kill Meng Yao and is prevented by Lan Xichen, and there are more explicit indications that he’s manipulating Jin Guangshan and is involved in the plot to turn everyone against Wei Wuxian.

Ouyang Zizhen: Ouyang Zizhen appears only briefly in the novel, during the Yi City arc. In CQL he has a much expanded role and is a pretty much perpetual fourth to Jin Ling, Lan Sizhui, and Lan Jingyi (especially post Yi City). He’s present most of the times they meet, and involved in Jin Ling’s confrontation with Wen Ning, and is present at the Second Siege of the Burial Mounds, where he intervenes with his father on behalf of Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. And he’s one of the best beans.

Sequence of Events:

In the novel, when Wei Wuxian awakes at Mo Manor, the Lan clan disciples come and they find an evil left arm that kills and possesses people. In CQL, they find a sword that does the same. This leads to changes throughout the plot in what, exactly, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian are searching for. In the novel, they pursue the pieces of Nie Mingjue’s body to various sites. In CQL, they instead are led to the same sequence of places by a sword spirit which turns out to be Baxia.

When Mo Xuanyu raises Wei Wuxian in the novel, Wei Wuxian has three curse scars representing three people that need to die: Madam Mo, Mo Ziyuan, and...one of the servants I think? In CQL, Wei Wuxian has a fourth cut that represents a fourth person he must kill: Jin Guangyao.

Because the risen dead don’t exist in the Untamed, the Dafan Mountain Goddess/Fairy statue incident plays out a little different. For example, Wei Wuxian doesn’t figure out what’s happened by observing graves, he figures it out by seeing “spirit grass.” However, the outcomes are essentially the same from a plot point of view.

In CQL, the extended flashback to the lectures starts right after Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian meet (right after Wen Ning is summoned and then flees). I don’t remember exactly how the timeline/intermingling of narratives from different points in times is structured in the novel but I know it’s different. They spend far longer in the “present” before going to the past, and jump back and forth a bit more too.

In CQL, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji have an early bonding period during the lectures (the lectures over all get more attention/time than in the novel) when they are drawn into a cave in the backhills that they enter through the cold spring. Within, there’s a guqin and a bunch of rabbits and the...spiritual embodiment?...of Lan Yi, who is introduced as the first female leader of the Lan Clan, a close friend of Baoshen Sanren, and the creator of the Chord Assassination Technique. Lan Yi acquaints them with the existence of the Yin Iron. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji also engage in a symbolic hand-fasting during this scene. In the show, this is where the bunnies come from; Wei Wuxian doesn’t capture them and bring them as “presents” like he does in the novel.

In CQL, between the Lectures and the Sunshot Campaign, Lan Wangji, Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng, and Nie Huaisang do some night hunting together. Among other things, during this time they meet Xue Yang, Xiao Xingchen, and Song Lan, when Xue Yang slaughters the Chang clan. This obviously has major implications for the role and age of these characters in CQL versus in the novel, when none of the three are met until Yi City. This time spent night-hunting is also when the flower spirit mini-side plot takes place, but it doesn’t get much screen time and isn’t as prominent as in the novel, nor is the entire “Wei Wuxian woos her where no one else did” thing a feature of the show. Also, they encounter the Dafan Mountain Goddess at this time.

The Wen Clan attacks Cloud Recesses in the novel because of perceived improprieties, and Lan Wangji is injured while trying to protect the library. Lan Xichen disappears, and Clan Leader Lan is killed. In CQL, Clan Leader Lan is already dead at this point and Lan Xichen is in charge of the clan (while it’s never explicit, it’s implied that the age gap between Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji, and between Nie Mingjue and Nie Huaisang, is greater in the show than it is in the novel). When Wen Xu attacks, they hide in the cave where Lan Yi appeared to Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji, but the disciples who aren’t members of the Lan specifically can’t enter, so Wen Xu begins to massacre them. To prevent that, Lan Wangji emerges, and that’s when his leg is broken. (Su She is also prominent in this scene in CQL, but he’s not in the novel.)

During the Indoctrinations, in CQL it’s shown that Wei Wuxian is afraid of dogs after Wen Chao locks him in a dungeon room with one. This also serves as bonding time with Wen Ning, who helps Wei Wuxian with medicine that Wen Qing has provided. This scene doesn’t take place in the novel; in the novel Wei Wuxian’s fear of dogs is almost entirely shown through his interactions with Fairy.

Also during the Indoctrinations in CQL, there’s a lot of friction between Wen Chao and Wen Qing because Wen Qing keeps trying to help the prisoners in small ways. In the novel, Wen Qing hasn’t been introduced at this point in the story.

Wei Wuxian’s Death: In the novel, Wei Wuxian retreats to the Burial Mounds, the clans unite against him, storm the Burial Mounds, and kill him - Jiang Cheng gets credit for the kill, but in actuality, Wei Wuxian's own resentment-controlled undead tear him apart when his magic backfires. (see this comment for more info) In the Untamed, after a battle outside the Nightless City, Wei Wuxian realizes how wrong everything has gone, destroys the Stygian Tiger amulet, and throws himself from the mountain. Despite a “tease” that Jiang Cheng stabbed him, it’s later shown that no, Wei Wuxian’s death was suicide despite Lan Wangji trying to save him and Jiang Cheng deciding not to stab him.

Wen Chao’s Death: While it’s implied in CQL that Wei Wuxian has been tormenting Wen Chao, it’s nowhere near as explicit as in the novel. It’s loosely suggested in CQL that perhaps Wen Chao’s condition when Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji find him is the result of fear and self-neglect - basically that Wei Wuxian’s torment is causing Wen Chao to hallucinate frightening things. Instead of, you know, Wei Wuxian’s torment causing him to eat himself.

In the novel, Wei Wuxian is dead for 13 years. In CQL, he’s dead for 16 years.

Wei Wuxian’s resurrection: In the novel, because Wei Wuxian doesn’t look like himself, he doesn’t realize that Lan Wangji has recognized him because he played WangXian, so he engages in multiple behaviors to try to disgust and drive Lan Wangji away (all of which fail, of course, because Lan Wangji knows the truth). In CQL, because Wei Wuxian looks like himself, when he wakes up without his mask in Cloud Recesses he immediately knows that Lan Wangji has recognized him and there’s no further mystery in that regard (except for how Lan Wangji recognized him while he WAS masked, which is the same in both - because of the song). (Lan Xichen also subsequently recognizes him while he’s masked, at an earlier point than he does in the novel unless I’ve badly misremembered. Which is always possible).

The Yi City arc is quite different between the two. Honestly, I skip the most painful parts of the Yi City arc, including the entire flashback sequences, because I knew they’d fuck me up right good without being worth it, so I’m not able to go into depth here, but. Some examples include:

Because in CQL, Xiao Xingchen, Song Lan, and Xue Yang were introduced during the “past” timeline, they’re considerably older than in the novel.

Due to censorship, A-Qing is not a spirit as she is in the novel. Instead, she’s still alive but she’s had her tongue torn out and been blinded by Xue Yang. She ultimately sacrifices her life to help Wei Wuxian et al kill Xue Yang.

In CQL, it’s shown that Xiao Xingchen would leave a sweet on Xue Yang’s pillow every day, and when Xue Yang dies the last gifted sweet falls from his hand.

(if anyone reading this wants to help flesh it out please do chime in because I know it’s incomplete but I Cannot with that bit of the story.)

During the Second Siege of the Burial Mounds, in the novel, after Wei Wuxian paints himself with the lure talismans, he and Lan Wangji are on the verge of being overpowered when the corpses of the Wen clan members that Wei Wuxian saved rise from the blood pool and help protect them. In CQL, the Wen clan members are hung by the Jin clan and left for the birds outside of the Nightless City, so they could never have been in the blood pool, even if such a thing would have made it past censors (which it never would have).

The novel contains pornographic content, including an illicit kiss that Lan Wangji steals from Wei Wuxian during the Phoenix Mountain hunt, and actual sex, with their first time being before the confrontation at Guanyin Temple.

During the Guanyin temple confrontation, in the novel there’s extensive discussion of Jin Guangyao’s childhood in the brothel, including information about his mother and why he spared Sisi as opposed to all the other prostitutes. Further, it’s explicit that the Guanyin temple has been built on the site where that brothel used to stand and that the coffin Jin Guangyao is digging up is meant to contain his mother’s body. The entire temple is dedicated to her. In CQL a lot of this is simply not explained or left ambiguous.

In the novel, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian are married and return to Cloud Recesses. In CQL, they travel together for a time, part ways, and then are reunited. Lan Wangji becomes the Chief Cultivator, replacing Jin Guangyao.

...that’s everything we came up with. Alright, everyone, what’d we miss? :D

#mdzs #modaozushi #the untamed #untamed #chenqingling #resource #i don't even know how to tag this #i hope this is helpful and doesn't seem biased #obviously i have my preferences as do we all but I tried to just list what was different #without assigning value to one or the other #because i know i've wished for a list like this a time or two #if folks do suggest changes or additions #i will add them when i'm able #but make no promises of promptness #sorry

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graham-cheshire · 5 years ago

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Study & Theories for the Gromm

Hello once again dear readers. For those of you who haven’t heard of @starr-fall-knight-rise I suggest visiting them and reading their stories, as they are some of my favorite sci-fi stories and provide entertaining perspectives on humanity from the viewpoint of aliens as well as forming the basis of this post here.

I have been very pleased with how well my previous two posts were received and have considered continuing this little series. Today though I will be covering a species I did not anticipate doing when I first considered doing posts like these, called the Gromm.

My decision to cover this species came after starr-fall’s big reveal on April 23rd got me to finally create a Discord account and getting on their server, where I discovered a composed list of the alien species and their appearances. The Gromm is one species that is not on that list and in fact has little information on them despite playing an important role in an arc of starr-fall’s stories known as “The Burg War”

As usual I shall start by providing confirmed facts and information about the physical appearance of the Gromm by starr-fall’s stories and answered questions, then I shall list what information we can infer from other provided details, and wrap up with my own theories regarding what is the most plausible for their appearance.

As a note about the Gromm, most of the information given on them is that they are coated in slime and are described as being slug-like, so for reader with a weak stomach to such things I advise reading at your own risk.

Before starting there are the following disclaimers= First: I want to give thanks to starr-fall-knight-rise for allowing me to do this & for receiving my speculations positively, I in no way own the Gromm or make any claim to doing so & want to say that I am doing this simply because I love starr-fall’s stories & wish to contribute in some way to the fandom. Secondly: I am by no means a biologist & most of my research comes from the internet, if I am wrong in my information please do not bash me and simply provide clarification in the comments. Thirdly: I will use reference images to help describe my thinking and theories and I in no way own or take credit for these images.

The Confirmed Appearance Details

In this area we have more to go on than we did with the Gnar’lack or the Finnari, but also not having much that lends to a full description with which to imagine their total appearance, but they provide great starting points.

“...considerable mucus tissue covering most of its body.”

“...eyes rolling against its chapped skin,”

“The creature had no real mouth to drink like a human,”

“the Gromm, who have mucus membranes covering their bodies,”

“a sort of gelatinous slime-covered species”

“slug-like creatures that require water to survive”

The Inferred Appearance Details

“...the shriveled corpse dried into a husk under the sun. “This thing looks like a F***ing mummy.” The captain mumbled...” = With this and a general knowledge of mummies I believe we can infer that the Gromm possess both skin and an internal structure of bones &/or organs that can support such skin when the body is desiccated, rather than being just a blob of slime.

“The average Gromm was about three times the size of that body,” = With this we can infer that a large amount of a Gromm’s body mass is made up of moisture, suggesting either that their exterior layer of slime is thick or that they have a bloated appearance.

“...no real mouth to drink like a human, so instead, they dumped the bucket of water over the creature’s deflated form. Immediately, it began to look better, perking up & swelling to a proper size.” = From this it can be inferred that they don’t possess mouths that are typical to humans and suggests that they absorb moisture and hydration through their skin. More will be discussed about that in the Theory section.

“It took a gasping breath” = With this we can infer that the Gromm at least possess some form of mouth through which they can breathe, due to the nature of the act of “gasping”.

“The average Gromm didn’t produce more than a quart of slime per day,”= More on this will be covered in the Theories section but this can be used to infer that the Gromm are likely larger than humans.

“The Gromm sat up...”= With this we can infer that the Gromm possess bones to support movement and some form of waist or structure with which one half of their body in on the ground and the other half raised and held aloft.

“...settlements...”, “...buildings...”, “...city...” = With this we can infer that the Gromm possess appendages with which to operate tools and perform construction.

“as the Gromm citizens dived for cover.” = With this I think we can infer that the Gromm are not totally slug-like in the manner of movement, as “diving for cover” would suggest a need for speed that slugs and the like do not possess.

“...species that required a lot of water to maintain their homeostasis,”, “...creatures that require water to survive,”= With this I think we can infer that the Gromm might be amphibious in nature, or possessing qualities that would aid in marine-life or travelling in water.

Theorized Appearance Details

To start this section off let’s confirm that two main points on the Gromm is that they are slug-like and covered in slime, so a large part of my theories shall be draw from information on these.

To begin I’d assume that the complete body structure of the average Gromm would resemble that of an earth slug, see below:

And I think we should keep this comparison in mind and attempt to not stray far from it in the future theories as the Gromm would need to retain resemblance to slugs for the comparison to be made.

As general information on slugs, they are a type of animal called a gastropod, in the same area as snails. The majority of all named species of slug live in marine environments but people are more familiar with the type known as “land slugs”.

The majority of land slugs have two pairs of retractable “feelers”/tentacles on their head, with the upper pair being light-sensing and having eyespots on the ends, while the lower pair provide a sense of smell. With the Gromm I feel it’d make sense to keep these “eyestalks” as in the Confirmed section one was said to have had it’s “eyes rolling against its chapped skin”, which would be a weird phrasing for simply rolling eyes.

For the mouth we have inferred that it is not the standard mouth like with a human so I’m inclined to think that it is a mouth like that of a slug, which eats using a minutely toothed chitinous ribbon, called a radula, that is typically used for scraping or cutting food.

As a further point on mouths and as a jumping point to the next main point of the Gromm let’s cover the fact that they don’t seem to absorb hydration by drinking and instead through their skin. This is actually a trait used by frogs and salamanders, who have mucus coatings that keep them moist and help them with oxygen diffusion across their skin, same as worms. The layer of mucus on frogs helps them retain moisture in their skin, which they use to both breathe and stay hydrated, so a similar function could be used by the Gromm.

Now let us cover another big point on the Gromm, their slime. To start I’ll clarify something from the Inferred section, where I suggested that the Gromm are larger than humans. It’s stated that the average Gromm produces about a quart of slime per day. Now in vertebrae, like humans, mucus is a slippery liquid that is used as a biological lubricant with a major function of protecting against infection. The difference here being that human mucus is interior while a Gromm’s mucus is exterior, covering the entirety of their body, every inch. The reason I theorize that the Gromm are larger than humans is that humans produce around 1 liter of mucus a day. Now not only a 1 quart is slighter larger than 1 liter but humans produce mucus in several parts of our body. While most people might already know that mucus-secreting tissue can be found in the nose, mouth, throat, and lungs it can also in our eyes, ears, GI tract, and reproductive and urinary organs. If one were to take all that mucus and balloon it out to form a layer I think it would be larger than a human, if not the same size.

To further cover the mucus it would likely not be a thin or runny layer as the Gromm have also been described as gelatinous, which suggests that they have an overall jelly-like appearance or that the slime layer is thick. It’s also likely that the slime is clear, as that is what mucus normally is, with the immune system making it white or yellow, and bacteria making it green.

As we established this slime likely helps the Gromm in hydration and protection against infection, but with slugs their slime serves other functions such as aiding in movement, finding mates, and warding off predators. And with that I’ll cover what I think is most plausible for the Gromm’s form of locomotion. Given the facts we have I don’t believe that the Gromm would move in the same way as a normal slug, they would need to be faster and have a body capable of sitting up and sitting down. Since the structure thus far has been largely gelatinous and doesn’t suggest limbs with joints or bones I’d be inclined to go with a tentacle approach, possible with smaller tentacles working similarly to legs to push and pull them along, example provided below:

This picture also provides a good example of how a Gromm might sit up as we’ve given the impression that they do.

Finally let’s discuss the limbs, particularly the appendages that they would use for manipulating tools. While it might be easy to assume that they’d have longer tentacles that doesn’t seem to be a theme among starr-fall’s other alien species, as most of them have hands, and so I’d stick with the hand structure but perhaps tentacle-like arms and fingers like so:

With that I do believe that we are done. I apologize for taking so long to post this collection of studies and theories, my work and life schedule have taken recent turns and upheavals, nothing major but things that did distract me. I hope this was all informative and that it was close to what starr-fall imagined. Hopefully I’ll have time to do another one of these soon for another of starr-fall’s less well-known species. If any readers have tips on where they think I could improve in my writing please comment they are always appreciated.

#starr-fall-knight-rise #alien #fan theory #research #species #just speculating #sci-fi #slime #slug #Studies & Theories of an Alien Species

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peblezq · 4 years ago

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RE: Alexander Hamilton Enslaved People (Historical Receipts)

Okay, so I had stumbled upon this post by the user (Historical Non-Fiction) claiming that recent discoveries has come to fruition, proving that Alexander Hamilton had enslaved people. The website link that post shared was kind of sketch, so I had taken it upon myself to bother my lovely friends on our amrev discord server to help me find real, solid proof. This is what we found. *Cue Law and Order sound effect*

I could not have compiled this without the help on there! So, THANK YOU, @queerrevolution1776 specifically for helping me with this! Go follow this blog, please! (Also, @clear-as-starlight has also helped me immensely in general as well so go follow her while you’re at it.)

The primary source where these historical receipts came from all links back to this paper by JESSIE SERFILIPPI - which is a fantastic read. They did a brilliant job compiling all of this information and honestly, they wrote it more flawlessly than I did (I just wanted to show you all the physical images of these historical documents instead of leaving y’all with some link and calling it a day.)

https://parks.ny.gov/documents/historic-sites/SchuylerMansionAlexanderHamiltonsHiddenHistoryasanEnslaver.pdf

If you don’t want to read that for whatever reason and/or you are like me and just wanna see some physical proof, Keep reading below for the direct sources that paper had used!

I always encourage people to do their own research and find as credible of a source as you can get. Here are the receipts that were discovered:

1. From Alexander Hamilton to George Clinton, [22 May 1781]

https://founders.archives.gov/documents/Hamilton/01-02-02-1174

Hamilton to Clinton, May of 1781.

"I am told it has lately risen something, and I expect by Col Hay’s return to receive a sufficient sum to pay the value of the woman Mrs. H had of Mrs. Clinton."

(Mrs. H being Mrs. Hamilton.) This is relating to the purchase of a woman from Clinton for Mrs. Hamilton.

2. Alexander Hamilton’s Cash Book

On March 23, 1796, Hamilton recorded in his cash book a payment of $250 to Philip Schuyler for

“2 Negro servants purchased by him for me.”

The photo provided above is taken from his cash book, stored at the Library of Congress.

3. Purchasing slaves for John Church (Angelica Schuyler Church’s husband)

This is for the purchase of a woman and a male child, although the purchase as listed being for John Church, Angelica's husband. At the time of the purchase the Church's were, according to the paper, moving back to America for good. So, the plausible deniability there is that the purchase was for the Church’s, not for Hamilton himself. Here are two things to consider: One, it doesn't matter. He purchased slaves for his family. Two, the next photo lends a great deal of credibility that either they were his or the family exchanged slaves as well.

4. Leasing Slaves

This is a log for receiving payment for the work of a slave male child. People did not lease slaves that weren't theirs, or at the very least, someone certainly didn't collect payment for their work. So, again, two situations. Schuyler Sr. let Hamilton borrow his slave and Hamilton leased the boy, or he was Hamilton's.

Later it would be written by Schuyler Sr. that he was sad for the Hamilton's and Angelica (Hamilton's daughter) for the loss of their male slave to yellow fever (which is presumably the same male) and regrets having send the children back when illness was in the house. That would place him outside of Schuyler Sr.'s possession again. Assuming it isn't the same young man, it is still more proof that Hamilton had slaves in his house. Continued on this below:

From Phillip Sr. to Eliza on November of 1794.

"The distress you have experienced from my Angelica’s indisposition, and that accompanied by the death of one of your servants from Yellow fever has deeply affected my feelings, may gracious heaven preserve you my Hamilton and the children from the fatal infection, If I had known of Dick’s death before the children had left me they should not have gone."

(Angelica being Hamilton's daughter.)

Some extra sources to look into: You may find the photos provided stored at the Library of Congress.

Thanks again to @queerrevolution1776 specifically for helping me with this! Go follow his blog, please! And do not forget to give this paper by JESSIE SERFILIPPI a read. RAW LINK: (https://parks.ny.gov/documents/historic-sites/SchuylerMansionAlexanderHamiltonsHiddenHistoryasanEnslaver.pdf)

Also, please consider this is a very recent discovery, so do not feel like Lin Manuel Miranda was purposely trying to mislead people with his musical. He based that musical on Ron Chernow ‘s biography of Alexander Hamilton and has stated that very clearly. Lin had never claimed to be an expert on Hamilton - and back when he wrote the musical, this information I just dumped upon all of you wasn’t common knowledge at that time. So please do not take this post as a #CancelLinManuelMiranda or #CancelHamiltonMusical thing. I love his work and I love that musical as an entertaining pieces of fiction. I do not condone cancel culture.

Hamilton was an asshole; a very fascinating one that I enjoy studying - and at the end of the day, he was painfully human. He should not be idolized or treated as a saint by any means. He was some white dude from 200+ years ago - I am not really surprised he owned slaves ~shrug~

Thank you for indulging me!

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leahazel · 3 years ago

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More about my morally-grey heroines and their messed-up relationships

I wanted to elaborate on this post I wrote about D&F and BFS, but it turns out that adding readmore links to reblogs is a PITA, and I just now that this is gonna turn into a fucking novelette.

So here we go.

Time to go into some detail about this!

Let’s define our terms:

“Decline and Fall” is my 120K+ series of loosely chronological, interconnected short fics, set in a tiny fandom for a visual novel that’s been in alpha development since 2015. For the record, the word count disincludes unfinished drafts, and stories that I’m holding back because they’re based on canon spoilers.

“Blood from Stone“ is my 100K unfinished Skyrim WIP, which began as a response to a kink meme prompt, and is not so much a rarepair as a non-existent one.

Both of these stories centrally feature young female protagonists and their sexual relationship with a much older man. Both heroines are... “grey” to say the least.

Let’s compare our fandoms, shall we?

Skyrim is a juggernaut fandom for a super-popular RPG which is part of a 30-yo franchise. The setting is moderately dark and casually sprinkled with murder cults, cannibalism, secret police death squads, and the prison industrial complex. The player character can be a thief and a murderer and everyone just learns to be okay with it because the only alternative is a fiery apocalypse. They also rob graves for the lulz.

Seven Kingdoms: The Princess Problem is a pinkie-toe-sized fandom for a hybrid RPG and dating sim where attractive young people flirt and date for the purpose of brokering world peace. The setting is one where you can actually broker world peace effectively. The player character can perpetrate a fair amount of proxy violence, but maintaining a good reputation dishonestly is legitimately difficult.

Now, let’s compare our heroines:

Corinne is a 24-year-old bounty hunter who became a folk hero, a soldier, and a cult assassin. She’s living alone and working for a living since she was 18. She’s never been in love, but she’s had multiple sexual and romantic relationships in the past. I deliberately wrote her as being very sexually confident and self-assured. She also has combat training, magical training, her special Dragonborn powers, and an incalculable amount of social clout. By every metric, she’s a powerful character. Though she can talk her way out of a tight spot (all my favorite characters can), she can also fight her way out.

Verity is (at the beginning of D&F) not yet 18 years old. She’s a princess from a very conservative kingdom who was raised to become a barter bride in a diplomatic marriage. The values that were passed to her were duty, tradition, and absolute obedience. Her primary skills are social, charisma, eloquence, and persuasion. Then she was dropped into the deep water of a diplomatic summit and had the weight of future history put on her shoulders, without ever having been taught how to make her own decisions or live with her regret.

To sum up, we have one hyper-competent, confident, and independent badass, universally recognized as powerful and dangerous, and then we have someone who’s basically a deconstruction of a traditional fantasy princess.

Okay, what about the more specific setting within the game world?

BFS is set in Markarth, arguably the most corrupt city in Skyrim, and the site of a localized war, on top of the 2-3 other wars that Skyrim has going on. The city is controlled by the cartel-like Silver-Blood family, and their enemies are swiftly and brutally eliminated. The rule of law is a joke. When the player character arrives at Markarth, they witness a chain or murders and are drawn into a conspiracy that sees them sentenced to life in prison for a crime they didn’t commit. The ruling elite suppress the native underclass by a variety of inventive methods. The roads into the city are controlled by the remnants of a violent but failed uprising, and this uprising is actually the origin story of Skyrim’s entire civil war storyline.

D&F is set in Revaire, explicitly the most violently war-torn of the seven kingdoms. Once the epicenter of a conquering empire, it was a country full of arts and culture, until a bloody coup slaughtered the entire royal line and instituted a new and more brutal regime. The new regime is on shaky grounds and foresighted people predict its imminent fall to rebel forces. So much, so canon. In D&F, I made a point of developing the new royals and their small coterie of supporters, as well as illustrating their constant struggle to conceal how widely reviled they are by the populace, and most of the former nobility. Their apathy to the plight of the common people is underscored in contrast to Verity’s compassion, which is ridiculed as a sentimental feminine affectation.

I’m attracted to certain themes, as you might have noticed.

Now, we get to talk about love interests.

Thongvor Silver-Blood is rather anemically characterized in Skyrim’s canon, so much of the information that I include in BFS is inferred. From his limited number of dialogues in the game, we know that he’s politically ambitious, a Stormcloak supporter, easily angered, and that he has one legitimate friend in the city. Like most Skyrim characters of his age bracket, he served in the Great War. He’s defined by his relationship to his generational cohort. In BFS, he’s def8ined in contrast to his brother. Thonar is comfortable being thought of as a villain. Thongvor still needs to believe that he’s the good guy. And I’m gonna get more into that in later chapters, too.

As a love interest, he’s initially in awe of Corinne, and always genuinely adoring, but more than a little jealous and possessive. BFS is not a story about love redeeming bad men (don’t get me started), but Thongvor shows different sides of his personality to different people, and the side that Corinne gets to see is much nicer than what most people do.

Hyperion Asper is a character of my own devising, whose existence in 7KPP canon is purely implied. We know his children, Jarrod and Gisette, and we knew that he organized a coup to seize the throne. I posit him as a tyrant and unrepentant child-killer (not directly stated in D&F, at least not yet). He’s ruthless and manipulative and his sole purpose is maintaining a sense of personal power. I structured him as the bad example that Jarrod tries -- and fails -- to live up to.

As a love interest... look, he’s a man who’s cheating on his wife with his son’s wife. He seduces Verity and manipulates her, and takes a special delight in pushing her buttons. All his compliments to her are mean-spirited and back-handed. He’s also jealous and possessive... which is especially pathetic, since he’s jealous of his own son, whom Verity doesn’t even like. His rage is a constant implied undercurrent in the narrative.

And the relationship dynamics themselves?

Corinne kisses Thongvor, proposes marriage to him, and then sleeps with him before riding off into mortal danger. She’s fond and affectionate, but she shies away from intense emotions, whether negative or positive. Since they spend most of their time apart, their marriage has been defined by Thongvor yearning like a sailor’s wife, while Corinne ran around doing violence and crime. They only just had their first fight. It will change when they get to spend some more significant time together... but on the whole, their marriage is fairly happy, and the emotional dynamic favors Corinne -- so far. It’s not a pure gender reversal, but that element is definitely dominant.

Hyperion starts seducing Verity on their very first meeting, and relies on a combination of magnetic attraction and Verity’s inexperience in life to keep her coming back, against her better judgment. Their relationship is mutually defined by a combination of attraction and resentment of that attraction. The danger of the situation is an essential element, to the point where it’s hard to imagine their affair would survive without it. It’s a puzzle and a battle, a source of fascination but not of comfort. There’s lust involved, and curiosity, but not a shred of love or even like. The closest thing to genuine affection is when Verity briefly imagines that there could be a version of Hyperion she actually liked, cobbled from his various, hidden good qualities. Any trappings of a genuine relationship are deliberately discordant.

I have tried, more than once, to imagine an alternate universe in which these two could be happy. It can’t be done. they are a study in dysfunction.

So where’s the similarity, with all these differences outlined?

Corinne’s choice to marry into the Silver-Blood family makes her complicit in their rule of the Reach, corrupt and reactionary as it is. Her reluctance to accept being called by their name reflects a reluctance to confront unpleasant truths that’s fundamental to her character. Choosing to be one of them affects and will continue to affect how other people see her, mostly negatively, and mostly without her being aware of it. Being Thongvor’s wife has gained her enemies. The fact that she doesn’t share his more reactionary views is something that they’ve both chosen to elegantly ignore, but the rest of the world won’t be so generous.

Verity’s choice to marry into the Revaire royal family makes her complicit in their violence against the forces rebelling against them, albeit in a more subtle way. Her personal dislike of Jarrod and the fact that their marriage was purely political will not absolve her in anyone’s eyes. Neither will her compassionate and charitable character, which can only be seen as a fig leaf to the Revaire royals’ general brutality. She has lost at least one good friend -- who will never see her the same way, since she chose to throw her lot in with his enemies. She will go down in history as an Asper wife -- but if she’s lucky, not just as that.

Both Corinne and Verity choose to accept some of the violence of the system that they live under, in order to serve their own lofty, long-term goals. Both of them are more image-driven than they care to admit, and though they are genuinely caring and compassionate, they will readily sacrifice compassion in service on their goals. They are queens (or queen-like figures), one-degree-of-separation members of the ruling class, implicated but not directly in control.

And their relationships serve to highlight what they are willing to accept, even though it goes against their conscience.

Is there a conclusion to be drawn here?

Sort of. I want to write about power, compromise and complicity. For whatever reason, it turns out that yw/om relationships are... a really good vehicle for exploring that. I can’t really explain why that is, just yet. I just... have had these thoughts floating, unstructured, in my head for months on end. I needed to get them out on paper, and give them some semblance of order.

I don’t even know why anyone but me would read this, as long and meandering as it is. But having it accessible might be of use to me.

#blood from stone #decline and fall #train wreck verity #i don't know why anyone would read this #it's nearly 2k words #and it has no real conclusion #hazel's d&f/bfs meta spiel

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universejunction · 3 years ago

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Midwayers, and problems of intended belief

A discord conversation (at first about fae and spirits)

Me:

I feel so far behind on learning about fae and spirits and such. When I thought The Urantia Book was more than a well-intentioned hoax it was easy to think fae and such are all just what it calls "midwayers". Now I'm... wide open to new interpretations. I know I'm not behind, I'm just where I am, but still...

I would love to give you more of an idea, but I don't know a ton about the Urantia book or what you mean by midwayers.

Me:

Oof, okay. I don't expect much in the way of answers, I know I'll get what I get in time. But I will take this opportunity to share.

In the Urantia Book, it make a lot of distinction between spirit and matter, as you might expect. Mind is the means by which Spirit rules over matter, yada yada. It also has a ton of details on angels.

There's a ton of history in there too, which I'm now interpreting as metaphor at best, because it's sure as shit not factual with its racial skeletal types and what not.

Anyway... Y'know, I'm gonna give the summary and then see if I have the energy for the story, because I'm worn out.

Basically, midwayers are midway between material and spiritual (but they're not, like, pure mind), covering the gap between angels and humans. They're native to the world, but descended from super-humans. They're immortal and stick around until the "age of light and life". And there's 1111 of either all of them or that might just be the first group of them.

Midwayers also get attributed cases of demonic possession (but so does mental illness), though they're not supposed to be able to do that anymore since Jesus completed his experience of life and earned his sovereignty (which was... before his public work) as basically god of local creation.

There's so much in this book and I carved it into my brain and now I don't trust it but it's still so quick to mind 😩

Innkeeper:

Woof okay I just read this

This is....so much not correct at all but also weirdly accurate

Which makes sense considering my personal theories on bleedthrough but thats another topic for another time

Me:

"Bleedthrough" sounds so very likely correct even without knowing what you mean exactly. That's pretty much my theory on how the Absolutes stuff seems so probably accurate despite everything else

I'm just going to offer that whenever you hear "superhuman," in a spiritual tome, your hackles should probably raise.

Like, it sounds like this is coming from the same branch of angelic and Christian occultism that recognize the Nephilim, but uh, just be mindful that rhetoric about "ancient superhumans" is almost ALWAYS used to sell bullshit about magic indigenous people

It sounds like you're mindful of that, but, heads up

The midwayer concept is ringing alarm bells between "Magic White People From Outer Space" to "Eugenics"

Innkeeper:

The idea of a liminal concept, something that exists in between those two states, I feel that holds water

The idea of literally everything else is uh

Worrisome at best

Me:

I'll add more in a sec but y'all right

Me (later):

To be clear, I was raised on the Urantia Book and am now moving away from it. For reasons mentioned above, among others.

It does come very close to "magic white people from outer space" and definitely is like "eugenics is a good idea but no one is qualified to direct it".

Me (replying to A):

Adding on, yes, but it's like... Fix-it fic. There's this spirit prince for the world who rebelled with Lucifer (who was like... a local administrator, not a god or angel), but when he arrived they like... called 100 natives [of Earth], cloned them with power-ups, and put people from other worlds like ours into the bodies who served as the prince's staff in the task of cultivating culture. Those staff, through essentially spiritual sex, created the first midwayers. After rebellion, the staff split and the ones who stay loyal to the prince are called nephilim and start a line of (acknowledged in the text) big ol' nasty racial supremacists. They're also called Nodites (c.f. "Land of Nod")

Later, Adam and Eve show up to "upstep" human evolution (disease resistance, humor, art... yeah, magic white people) but because the prince rebelled and shit's fucked, they're having a hard time. Eve bangs a local tribe leader to get an alliance and fucks everything up (that results in Cain. Able is Adam and Eve's next kid). So now should-be-immortal Adam and Eve only have a few hundred years to live and their (already many) kids get the choice to leave and most of them do.

A while later, their first son, Adamson, goes off to start a new cultural center, meets a woman named Rata who "claims" to be the last pure-line Nodite. [They] have a bunch of kids, every 4th of which is invisible(???), and they make those kids get together (yikes!) and that's where the secondary midwayers come from.

And it lampshades all this like "many things in the spiritual development of a world are hard to understand." Uh, yeah! History is weird, sure, but as it's fan fic, it's creepy.

So, I'm saying this with all the love in my heart, but you can only portray things as fiction which are not intended to be believed.

That's not a fanfiction, that's a religious text. That is a religious text with a fully realized theology and metaphysics, complete with creation story. I think it is harmful to approach it as anything else, or as a "generic" metaphysical practice. (Relatedly, there is no such thing as "generic witchcraft," which is a main point of this history of the occult book club).

Doing a little bit more research, it's a religious text associated loosely with the Urantia Foundation and written in 1955. I'm not seeing any indication at the moment that there's a formal power structure associated with the movement, which lessens the chance for cult behavior.

What I will suggest to you is that you need to approach this work like you would any other religious text. Set aside questions of whether the text is "accurate" or "true." If you are honestly interested in the metaphysical, you should be able to separate empirical reality and history for the metaphysical. If you can't do that, take five steps back in your practice and come back once you can.

So, setting aside questions of truth, does this cosmology reflect the things you believe about the world? Does it encourage a way of thinking about people that you think is good, virtuous, honorable, etc? Can this text be used to uphold values that you hold, or do the natural extensions of this text lead to certain conclusions? Are those conclusions harmful?

For instance, I believe that eugenics is totally and morally abhorrent, and that there is fundamentally "no such thing" as a person who could pull it off "correctly." There's no way to do eugenics "right," just like I believe there is no morally correct way to, I don't know, punch a baby.

As such, even your acknowledgment that the text accepts eugenics makes it worthy of rejection in my mind.

Maybe you are interested and capable of doing the apologetics to make this into a compassionate religious movement. I don't know. I am not interested in doing that. But I do not think you can "move away" from this text, in the same way that you cannot "move away" from the bible, only from interpretations of it.

At some point, you have to believe in a basic assumption. If there's something that "feels right," there's only so far you can push it without that basic assumption.

If you think there is a separation between mind, body, and Spirit, wonderful. I would recommend you find another text and another basic set of assumptions. For instance, one that doesn't involve angels making angel-possesed magic native people for the point of preparing the world for the "good races."

Me:

Yes, you've got it right. Except that my interpretation has moved from "I think this book is what it claims" to "I think this was (probably well-intentioned, but still) a hoax perpetrated by ex-Seventh-Day Adventists". But for whatever good intentions may've been involved, the fact that it's intended to be believed makes it very harmful. I talked about it today as a way of saying "wow, look at this crazy shit" and talking through the changes involved in my different interpretation / loss of faith.

I don't believe in midwayers anymore and don't know what to believe, I'm trying to do the work, as you say, of finding what parts are good and what's harmful, comparing with empirical stuff, etc. But, however ready I may've been to walk away from the Urantia Book, it's still a process of recognizing what ideas I have based on it and examining them in turn to see what's salvageable.

Innkeeper:

I think that's an incredibly respectful way to go about it, Toph.

When something is that formative to you as a person, it's rarely as easy as learning it's harmful and then moving on, entirely separated from the source material. There's a long process of digging up every assumption you know you have--and many you don't know you have, or don't have at all--and needing to challenge them in a newer, healthier framework. One of the most potent aspects of the danger of cults is that they're incredibly difficult to challenge that base assumption, and it can take years if not a lifetime to walk a path that steadily heads away from what was taught.

So to acknowledge something formative's deep capacity for danger and harm, and go through the long process of picking it apart piece by piece to ensure you don't retain its harmfulness as you separate from it, I think that's the best possible way to go about something.

#urantia analysis #behold my eloquence #long post

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josefavomjaaga · 4 years ago

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Helfert, Joachim Murat, Chapter 2, Part 3

So, the Congress of Vienna is about to be officially opened, and the mood particularly among British diplomats has turned somewhat hostile towards a King Joachim Murat on the throne of Naples. Murat does not attend the congress in person (apparently, Eugène Beauharnais was the only member of the family who did) but has sent representatives there. Meanwhile, back in Naples:

What impression those news from the Congress of Vienna had on the Court of Naples the interested reader can imagine. The hot-tempered king went from one excitement to another, while Caroline, faithful to the role she had taken upon herself, maintained her prudent attitude and, supported by Count Mier, did not miss any opportunity to repeat to her husband the advice that Castlereagh had given him through the Duke of Campochiaro. But who can account for his disposition? Every ray of hope set him aglow, every piece of unfavourable news threw him into a state of despair, in which he returned to all the great plans which they had so often tried to put out of his mind.

A peculiar impression was made on Joachim by the arrival of French General Boulnois, who, coming from the Jonian Islands, which he had handed over to the Allies in the name of his king, arrived in Naples in the night of 12 to 13 October and requested an audience with the king the very next day, which the king granted him. Boulnois made all sorts of captivating statements, spoke of the admiration that King Louis had for Joachim's military qualities and merits, of the European situation, of the possibility of a renewed outbreak of hostilities, of the great role that Joachim would then be called upon to play in Italy, and the like, so that the king finally asked him in amazement whether he had the authority to enter into any negotiations with him. Boulnois then suddenly gave the conversation a different turn, spoke about the conditions in France, about the discontent that prevailed in the army against Louis XVIII, about the confidence that King Joachim enjoyed in the same circles as in a large part of the French nation, until finally the King took leave of him, not without letting him know that he was not at all willing to fall into the trap that was being set for him from a certain side.

On October 22nd, Roccaromana returned from Vienna, where he had found the most friendly reception at Court, which made the King quite happy for a moment; he was only worried again that Emperor Franz had not answered him in writing. The Duke had less favourable news to report about the rest of the society, whose views and aims were not at all in harmony with the King's interests. A confirmation of this seemed to come on November 4, when a courier arrived from the Russian envoy to the Congress, Nesselrode, summoning General Tuyll to Vienna. Although assurances were enclosed that this step had no political motives whatsoever and that the baron would return to his post as soon as possible, it could not fail that at court and in government circles people put their heads together and suspected all sorts of things. Joachim himself fell into gloomy contemplation, did not want to believe that the matter was as it was presented, and saw himself sacrificed by Russia. When a few days later, on 12 November, Major Prince Alliano brought bad news from Vienna - the congress had been formally opened on 1 November without the two Neapolitan plenipotentiaries being recognised and admitted as participants - the King at first felt as if he had been crushed, and in the second dreamed of nothing but war, defence to the knife.

The time was high for the arrival of a friendlier messenger: General Filangieri, who on the 17th delivered a handwritten letter from Emperor Franz to his monarch. The next day, when our envoy appeared before the King, he found him in a mood of true exuberance. "I am imbued with the goodness of your Emperor," he exclaimed: "It is he, his mighty protection, to whom I shall owe my crown. I shall make it my duty to repeat this often to my children, in order to instil in them, for his illustrious house, the same sentiments of recognition and attachment which have inspired me. My person, my army, everything I possess, I place at his disposal. May he have the goodness to tell me what I should do in order to be of service to him. I want to fight for him with my troops, not only in Italy, no, everywhere where his interests make it desirable. Let him but procure for me the recognition of England, and then I shall fear neither France nor Spain. These two powers cannot disembark 20,000 men; but there shall be 40,000 of them, and I shall know how to resist them!"

What Joachim had tossed around in his conversation with Mier concerning France and Spain related to all sorts of rumours that kept cropping up, sometimes in this form, sometimes in another. Now it was said that in Sicily people were busily equipping all the warships and transport ships, increasing the land troops and making preparations to receive a Spanish army corps. Then again Gallo received news from Rome: the French minister there had spoken loudly about a family agreement between the courts of Paris and Madrid in favour of Ferdinand IV, and the Pope had also promised to support it. Since Maria Carolina was known to be dead, it was her two sons in whose hands the threads of all these various activities were brought together. The hereditary Prince Franz, it was said in Naples, had promoted himself to the position of head of the Carbonari, maintained the connection between those of Calabria and those in Sicily; the younger Prince formed the centre of all the common arrangements of the three Bourbon courts in Vienna. Since Leopold had a brother of Murat's lieutenant-general d'Ambrosio in his entourage, the latter was sent to Vienna at the turn of the year 1814/15 to find out what was going on and to take care of other matters there…

General Filangieri also delivered a letter from Prince Metternich to Mier, who was instructed to appease the king. " It is not seldom one creates embarrassments for oneself," wrote the wise Chancellor of State, "if one tries to meet them by too impatient haste. The king's attitude, the only one that corresponds to his true interests, must be that of calm. He is in his own country, he has a fine army, between him and France he has the armed forces of Austria; he must come to an understanding with the only immediate border neighbour he has, and he must place himself in the position of a power which seeks no quarrel with any other, but which would reject any attack". The immediate border neighbour of Joachim, as hardly needs to be said, meant none other than the Pope, and Count Mier was confident that he could take advantage of the happy mood in which our Emperor's letter had put the king to persuade him to give up his seemingly hostile position in the Marches. But on this point he found Joachim unbending. He showed himself willing in secondary matters; he promised to instruct Prince Carascosa to comply in all respects with the wishes of the FM Bellegarde; he also declared himself willing, if desired in Vienna, to replace this general, a hothead and full of mistrust, by another. In essence, however, the king not only maintained his old position, but gave the matter a twist, as if it were Naples which had to be concerned about Rome. In the Marches, he claimed, there were no more than 16,000 men and they were spread out from Ascoli to Fano, which was indispensable for the maintenance of peace in these regions; only recently an uprising had broken out at Osimo near Ancona, and mobile columns had had to be sent out to quell it. Of course, his own speeches revealed that the discontent of the population in the Marches was in fact only due to the oppressive presence of his troops, and the papal government actually accused his agencies of deliberately sowing discord and discontent in order to provide him with a pretext for interference. Cardinal Bacca, by direct order of the Pope, sent a very serious, even impolite letter to the Neapolitan Consul Zuccari in Rome, openly denouncing his activities, the scouts and agitators he had in his guard, the secret meetings he was organising and the like, and threatening to use police force. In this way, the tension between the two neighbouring governments grew and was about to erupt into open hostility.

I guess, talking about wanting to fight for whoever and for whatever reason really was the worst thing Murat could do at that moment. And I wonder if, by attending the congress in person, Murat might to some degree have been able to force the other governments' hand. If this would not have been a perfect moment for some Gascon impudence - just mingle and be a pain everybody's ass, remind them that you're there and will not go away. It's much harder to ignore somebody if he's standing right beside you.

But then again, they probably would have managed to do that, too, if they deemed it necessary.

#joachim murat #vienna congress #metternich #helfert murat

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